Buncha stuff

Wow I thought I was way behind but I discover that I'm not. No pressing issues for me to fulminate about so just a few thoughts that wandered across my forehead.

One of you readers (I think it was Drew) got me started thinking about a phrase from Dietrich Bonhoeffer. If you don't know Bonhoeffer google him and learn. You'll be a better person for knowing him. Anyway he wrote about how our faith should infect our entire lives.

Infect. What a great image.

So I was thinking about how that would really work in day to day life. Do we all become monks and nuns? I don't think that's where he was going with it. But I do think this may be in line with it. It's still winter where I am, cold and damp and nasty. I was watching one of the supermarket employees doing what HAS to be the worst job this time of year. Playing grocery cart cowboy. How often do we look out the windshield of our car and see a cart that's been left by someone who can't or more likely simply won't take the time to put it into one of the corrals? So my infection now will show in a new way. I will continue to put my cart away and if there are carts in the area of my car I'll put them away too. Not for thanks or glory or a crown in heaven. Just because I can and I can ease the way of another human being doing it.


I had a death in my extended "family" this week. She had been my summer time "Mom" for several years and a friend of my family since I was in third grade. Her son is one of my best friends in the world and her daughter is as close to a sister as I've ever had. But this past Wednesday she was ready to go. It had been a long illness that had left her bedridden and unable to enjoy life. And enjoying life seemed to be one of Ellen's best things. When I think of Ellen I think of two things one happy one sad. The sad one is I always think of a cigarette. The habit may or may not have killed her but it didn't help in so many ways. The happy one is her laugh. There was nothing small about Ellen's laugh. In fact she lived most of her life large. I haven't seen her in a couple years (she'd come up to my neck of the woods most summers and I'd make sure to see her)and as is too often the case I realize what a dope I'd been by letting "life" (which is mostly stupid and unimportant stuff) get in the way of people. I'm sorry I didn't make the time to spend some time with her. I'll miss her. I believe she's in a better place with her husband Ralph and my Dad and her folks and many other people she loved. Goodbye Ellen.

Peace

Mild Language

I was in a video arcade the other day. Yes, I go to video arcades. I like video arcades. I have games I play regularly when I'm there. My current favorite is a sniper game called "Silent Scope". I shoot the bad guys and I get extra points for shooting them in the head. You're just going to have to learn to deal with it.

As I was exchanging my money for tokens I noticed a sign on the wall explaining the "ratings" for each of the game. Down at the bottom was one listed as "Mild Language" which explained that meant the games used "commonly heard four letter words"

Ummmmm, OK.


That would be like, cake and milk and work, right?

No,probably not.

When did that kind of language (I don't really have to give you a list right?) become "Mild Language"? When did it become socially acceptable? When did it stop being a big deal?

I'll be honest, I know all those words (and many more) and have used them all. Still do. But there's no pretense that they are "nice" words or "acceptable" words. They are profane words. My dictionary lists profane as meaning "vulgar or coarse". I use them as expressions of profound emotions. They are not playthings, not childish toys to be tossed around carelessly.

I've made my living for over two decades using language and the lack of respect for language I see today concerns me. We're far too likely to just brush something off by saying "That's not what I meant" as if that solves the problem. Words have power. Words have meanings. Meanings that can change based on context and delivery. They're damned dangerous things and should be treated as such.

Commonly used four letter words. Shouldn't those be glad and love and life?

Peace

A Delicate subject

The following is my column from the March issue of ChurchActs, the diocesan newspaper of the Diocese of WNY


There are certain subjects that Episcopalians are traditionally reluctant to discuss. Two of them will spring to mind instantly – Evangelism and Stewardship. But there's a third that we avoid discussing so utterly it simply never occurs to us to include it on the list – Sex. (You may think that the current debate in the worldwide Communion is more than enough talk of sex. I would argue that it has very little to do with sex actually and has much more to do with Scripture and our understanding thereof) As a young person you're being raised in world saturated in more sexual imagery than any other civilization of which I'm aware. For your church NOT to talk with you about it from a faith based point of view is quite simply a sin in my opinion.
So let me go and sin no more. Let's talk about sex.
First I'm not going to spend ANY time discussing the "plumbing". Our schools begin telling you how everything works starting at an amazingly young age. If you don't know "how it works" then you're REALLY not paying attention.
Second I'm not going to spend a lot of time on the "Thou Shalt Not" and "It's a Sin" arguments. Why? Because I know that way too many young people just shrug those ideas off. Maybe there aren't any better arguments than that but I'm not willing to walk away without trying. So here goes.

Argument #1 – We've got sex at the wrong end of the relationship
I've lived more than half of my expected lifetime as I write this and I haven't found anything more intimate than sex. It is quite simply the profound act coming of two people together. It scores at the high end of the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual scales. There's nothing that comes close that won't kill you. So why on earth would anyone do this with someone they don't already know intimately, deeply, profoundly? Having sex with someone changes the relationship forever. Concepts like "hooking up" and "friends with privileges" and the granddaddy of them all "casual sex" attempt to make this profound act into snack food. God made sex special, that's my profound belief. God made us special, I believe that equally profoundly. So explain how having sex with any willing "hottie" honors the act, or ourselves, or He who made us and it?
Is waiting for that truly wonderful profound relationship hard? Frustrating beyond belief at times? Oh yes. By placing sex in the right position in that committed, long term relationship(which the church has historically recognized as marriage. Not because we want to keep young folks from having fun but as a recognition of the importance of the gift)we honor God, we honor ourselves, we honor the person we love.
Which leads us to:

Argument #2 – Being Loved vs. Making Love
These two have been confused for generations at least. It grows from one of the stupidest statements ever created: "If you loved me, you would". Let's get this straight, if he (or she because some young women now use this line) loved you, they wouldn't ask you to do something that you aren't prepared to do. When sex becomes a negotiating tool, when it is used in exchange for affection, respect, position or something of value it's no longer love of any kind. When someone withholds their emotional love and support unless they get what they want they are telling something very important about your relationship. You are not a beloved partner, you're a service provider. This concept of sex as a product on sale at all times I believe is why we see the rise in things like "date rape". You have what I want, I make what I think is a reasonable offer and if you don't sell, then I take it.
And that leads us to:

Argument #3 – It shouldn't be about selfishness
Our culture bases its attitude toward sex on a simple understanding: "It feels good, I like feeling good, I should be allowed to feel good as often as possible. Because it's all about me." I'm not arguing that it doesn't feel good. Rather I'm suggesting our faith doesn't call us to place ourselves in the center of everything. We're called to love God and we're called to love another. Do we love God if we use his gift as part of some kind of sexual Open House? Are we loving one another if we are using someone, even with affection, just to get our jollies? Doesn't a truly outwardly directed love bring us back to the concepts of Argument #1?
And finally:

Argument #4 – The self interest argument
How much are you worth? The Bible tells us that we are God's beloved. That's no small thing. The Creator of the Universe thinks you're wonderful and special. Even on your weird days. So are you willing to risk that special person by sleeping with someone whom you don't know well enough to know where they've been? And with whom they've been? Are you willing to trade that special person away for a date, or a piece of jewelry? Are you willing to let that beloved of God be someone else's plaything? Or are you going to say "I am beloved. With the right person in the right relationship at the RIGHT time we will do the right thing. And it will be wonderful. I won't accept anything less for me or for them or for God who loves me and wants me to enjoy it then."

Personally I'm with God on this one. You deserve nothing less, you should expect nothing less, you should settle for nothing less.

Peace

Better than I thought!

A bit of end of week silliness. Next week I've got a post that I'm very proud of (I know pride's a sin) and I hope you'll like it as well. It's title "A Delicate Subject" and I'll be talking about sex. Tune in first thing next week! Now for the silliness.

I'm actually not as nerdy as I've always thought. Of course my daughter says I'm a dork not a nerd so there you go. Actually her last assessment was random, weird psycho dork...



Peace

A call to Change

A couple weeks ago I posted a thought process that had started on my way to work (Feb 8 "A thing I think I think"). It got me started thinking about how we approach bringing folks along in their life in faith. Are we trying to make it easy when we shouldn't? Then in my previous post (Feb 11, "A bit at a time")I thought I'd take on the "basics" one by one.
Upon further contemplation I've decided against that. You want to see what I believe are the basic "beliefs" of Christianity check the link in the title of the Feb 8 post. I like what Mike chose for that list and how he explains them. I'm not going to try and out write him on the subject.

So where does that leave me? How do I answer that initial question? It came to me while I was driving again. What we're failing to do, the way that we're making this too easy is that we're not clearly explaining that all that stuff doesn't mean a thing if you don't change. That's the foundational piece that I think we're missing. The idea is that you will be changed.

And not just by going to church on Sunday. The change that comes through faith is more than another schedule item on your PDA. We're not making clear that a life in faith changes everything. How we view people, how we view money, how we drive, how we talk, how we think, how we treat people, how we spend our money, how we use our time. It means changing how we view ourselves. It means turning away from the inward focus for our lives and accepting an outward one.

That's a scary thought and no doubt some folks will turn away from us because of it. Guess what they turned away from Jesus too at that same point. That change doesn't mean that we all become little faith 'droids carefully programmed to respond exactly the same as all the other little 'droids. Rather it gives us a standard by which to measure our lives and what we do with them. That measure is love. Love for God, the big I AM, and realizing that such a relationship is not all one way. We want God to love us and help us and value those things we love. God wants the same thing. The shift away from an inward focus ("What about MY needs?") to an outward focus means we begin to place God's concerns up front, even if they inconvenience us.

In the end during my drive I came to realize how overwhelming that change is. Quite literally there is NO part of my life that should not feel the impact of that change. My marriage, my parenting, how I deal with cashiers at the store. My relationship with the environment, the government, the economy, the culture. None of survives as it was.

It's not the learning or the believing that's the hard part so it's too bad we spend so much time and effort there. It's the living that's hard. It's the change that's so daunting and scary and hard.

So we should probably get started right now.

Peace

A bit at a time

This entry was the victim of a time crunch when I first wrote it. I've added a little bit to it that I had wanted in the original.


I've decided to take on the subject of a previous post a little at a time. I was talking about my feelings that we may be going too far over the edge in making the step into a life in faith easy. There are some hard choices (Yes even if you're a liberal Christian!) And there's some stuff that I think is non-negotiable. But most of that is heavy stuff and I don't want to do an incredibly LOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNGGGGG post to deal with them all. So let's take them on one at a time.

Which led me to the question of what's bedrock? What's the absolute bottom of the pile that has to be there? And the answer came back : God exists. If you're a person of faith in any of the three Abrahamic faiths (Christianity, Judaism and Islam) this is the foundation of it all. If you don't buy this one then the rest fall down. If you don't buy this one you may be a lot of things but you can't be a Christian. (I'll let Jewish and Islamic bloggers take it from here on their branches of the family) And I'm not buying the God as "The Force" kind of thing that some theologians (including a very well known Episcopal bishop) seem to be peddling. God is an entity that is capable of interacting with his creation (can we hold off on the gender neutral language debate? I will simply say that I don't believe that God is an anatomically correct male). In fact large portions of the stories of our faith are about those interactions.
But then something else dawned on me. It doesn't matter if I believe that God exists. And it doesn't matter if you (or someone) DOESN'T believe that God exists. Neither point of view changes a single damn thing about God. It doesn't matter if a Harvard professor declares God dead. It doesn't matter how much I pray, how little or what kind of music we play at worship. God is what God is. I don't think we're even capable of understanding what that last sentence really means. I'm also not sure that it matters too awful much. Remember when Moses was up on the mountain and asked God what he should tell the people? God didn't give a big bio, no divine CV of miracles and creation. As much as we like to fluff up the description, adding the beard and the flowing robes and the good looks (at least if you're into old white guys) what was sent back down that mountain was pretty simple...

He said - I am.

Works for me.
Peace

Just strange

I've got some more thoughts to share on the last post but I'm still working on them. In the meantime something that has perplexed me.

Don't know if it's happened where you are but the major fast food burger joints are all moving towards accepting credit cards.

Does that strike anyone else as ...well weird, bizarre, just wrong somehow? I just can't bring myself to walk up and say "I'd like two Happy meals and I'd like to put it on my platinum card".

Either the prices have gone way high or there's something else bizarre happening here.

Peace

A thing I think I think

You'll have to pardon me because this is a thought only at the beginning of growth. I have no idea where these ideas come from (I'm willing to blame anyone but myself) but they rattle around in my head. I was literally driving in to work this morning when I thought:

"Why are we wasting all this time with formation and education and relationship? Seems to me that more often than not Jesus just said, 'This is what you need to do'. Period. Think about the rich young man"

Again this is a thought just a 'borning here. I just don't remember any stories of Jesus doing small groups (other than the disciples), I don't remember him doing a lot of hanging out and relating. There was a lot of "This is what you need to be doing, like it or lump it" and if memory serves a lot of folks shaking their heads and walking away.

It's the kind of evangelism that folks in the middle half (both "liberal" and "conservative" - as much as I hate those labels) of the community of faith like to criticize as being done at either extreme. Yet the thought occurred (heresy for a moderately liberal person like myself) "What if they're right? What if they're following the example of Jesus by saying 'You know what? Some things are not negotiable. It's not about us making it easy for you, it's about you getting up off your comfortable butt and just doing it."

I have to admit there are parts of that attitude that I like. Some things aren't negotiable. Jesus was (and is) Messiah. That God exists. That we are the beloved of that God. And that God has expectations. That's a real simplification. The best summary of what I think of as ground zero was written by Mike Yaconnelli. If you click on the title of this entry it'll take you to it. I have a copy of it hanging in my office.

There's still the nagging question that I have to wrestle with - how much easing of the way do we need to do for new believers? How much of it is just "Take it or leave it"? And how do we find the balance that leaves us living out our evangelism in a loving, Christ-like manner?

That's what I get for thinking in my car.
Peace

Leave Everything

This is my February column for "ChurchActs" the newspaper of the Diocese of WNY


I heard an interesting story on the radio the other day. Airline flight attendants are trained for any possible kind of problem. For instance they're trained for the event of an “emergency landing”. Right down to the short, precise instructions they are to use to help people exit the plane. Recently they've had to add a new instruction to the training, “Leave Everything”. Seems that they've had a rash of folks who have stopped and tried to retrieve their stuff before they exited the aircraft. Now remember this is during an EMERGENCY. We're talking the plane has a serious problem and these folks are trying to pull things out of the overhead bins. The real problem of course is that they're likely to get themselves killed and kill everyone in the aisle behind them too. Crazy.
It struck me as I listened to the story that some of the hardest sayings of Jesus carry this same basic message. When the rich young man is told to give everything to the poor, when someone is told to let the dead bury the dead, or to leave their mother and father behind Jesus is telling us quite simply to “Leave Everything”. Like most of us those sayings trouble me. Am I supposed to leave my (mumble)-something year old mom? Abandon my wife and daughter? Walk away from my job? Leave my responsibilities? Just chuck it all, cross my arms on my chest and jump out the door onto the inflatable exit slide of salvation? Somehow that just doesn't feel right. Then I looked at my list above of stuff to leave and a thought occurred.
Let's start by defining “stuff” as broadly as possible. It includes all the material things but also all the relationships and responsibilities in your life. It's all your “stuff”. The thought occurred that maybe it's not so much “stuff” that's the problem but the “my” that comes before it. My stuff. My job. My mom. The folks on the airplane get into trouble because “their” stuff is more important to them than the folks around them. As I look at the Gospel teachings and the stories of the early church in the Acts of the Apostles I discover a very strong inclination to look outward, away from “me”. Maybe that's how we're supposed to leave everything. It's less about the stuff than our attitudes about them. When the “my” starts getting in the way of reaching God then it places me in danger. When I model a lifestyle that's all about “my” for family and friends then I'm pushing them into danger as well.
Think about this then: Let's change how we look at our stuff. If the relationship becomes I'm Donna's husband, I'm Rachel's dad, I'm Debby and Jack's son doesn't it change the relationship? Certainly it should change the attitude about that relationship. The relationship with a faith community changes when it becomes “I belong there” rather than “That's my church”. The same thing goes for school. By leaving the ownership of “my” behind we point our attention and our energy away from ourselves. Try it. Instead of thinking about so and so as “my friend” think of it as “I'm so and so's friend”. Now who are you focused on? Them. Somehow that does feel right.
The funny part (funny odd not ha-ha) is that suddenly the material things get set afloat too. You either end up as the computer's operator (which is a pretty silly concept) or the realization that it's just a thing. And things don't fit into the “Leave Everything” world, except as...well, things, objects, tools. None of that kind of “stuff” has any claim on us in the world Jesus calls us towards. It doesn't have the power to draw us away or make us stumble. A huge burden can be lifted from our lives and most of us would love to lose any burden we can these days.
So the next time you hear Jesus call take a look at what kind of stuff is in the way. Take a look at how big the “my” is that's trying to stand in your way. Is it some thing that you just “can't live without”? Is worry about what people might think (that's called “my image”)? Are you getting angry about what someone did because they're supposed to be “my friend”? Then just stop, take a breath and....Leave Everything.

Peace.

Some silliness

Yeah another silly survey. No I'm not really that age. Let's just say that the AARP people will be seeing me on their radar in a couple years. But's nice to know I'm still young(er) at heart

You Are 29 Years Old

29 Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

Peace

What are we thinking?

I was going to write a piece on the English prince Harry's unfortunate decision to go to a costume party wearing Nazi regalia. Thought I'd discuss the questions of how (and whether) we're teaching our youth on the subject of evil. I felt sorry for Harry, it's obvious that he simply didn't "get" what all the furor was about (you should pardon the expression). And that's not surprising. WW2 was old news when I was growing up, by now it's not that far removed from the Roman Empire in the minds of teens and young adults. That's where our failure jumps in, we're simply not doing a very good job of teaching about evil.
But Harry gets the pass because something even more offensive, something even more idiotic has taken front page. WQHT in NYC ran a "parody song" on its morning show this past Monday (1/24) that made racial jokes about the people hit by the tsunami, made jokes about child slavery and people watching their mothers die (Reuters story is linked below) The following day the station aired an apology to "...anyone who was offended". They should offer free psychiatric exams for anyone who WASN'T offended! Here's my problems with this incident:

These were adults There's no excuses these are grown ups, you know the folks who are supposed to be responsible and know what's going on. And it's not just a single person, the morning show "team" was something like 7 people. Apparently none of them said, "Hey, maybe this isn't a great idea". In fact the lead DJ was also the Program Director (a management position that usually has oversight of all on air stuff. She was the boss and responsible. She and the rest of her castmates are currently on indefinite suspension)

The state of the media This bugs me particularly because it's radio, where I made my living for 19.5 years. The station is yet another one that has sold its soul and social responsibility to the "shock jock" concept. This is the most loathsome disease that is attacking the medium that I love to this day. Being "shocking" is in fact a license to not care about anything and anyone. I was a morning jock for something like 17 years, and there were days when I ticked off some of my listeners with my bits. But the purpose was never to shock, it was never a situation where I had to say "OK, how do I top that?" The idea was always to make folks think. Thinking is the last thing on the agenda of a shock jock. A shock jock (or talk show host or whatever) is an anti-intellectual bully.

This next bit is NOT politically correct but it bugs me
This was done by folks who suffered at the hands of racism It's the racist nonsense that gets me. I'm sorry but shouldn't this be an area that Black America simply draws the line? Maybe I'm holding my brothers and sisters of color to too high a standard but they KNOW what racism feels like so why become party to that madness? Again maybe it's unfair and unreasonable but I expect better.

Finally there's Where's the common sense? How do you look yourself in the mirror and say "Hey, I think the suffering of these people is funny! And I mean FUNNY! We should take the time to write the lyrics (and maybe the tune) get into the studio record it and put it on the air. Yeah let's make some money on suffering!" How do you look yourself in the eye?

No there's no doubt about it. We've failed in our teaching on the subject of evil. Maybe it's time we started thinking about changing that.

Peace

There is no joy in 'Burgh-ville...

Well my beloved Steelers (that's the Pittsburgh Steelers of the National Football League for any non-fans of American football) had their season grind to a halt yesterday. They were overwhelmed by the defending league champs the New England Patriots. I have no doubt that there are many Steelers fans out there doing their usual plunge off the bandwagon. The cries of "They suck!" and "I'm never gonna watch them again" will be heard. True fans just shake our heads and ignore them. I'm a Steelers fan. One little loss isn't gonna put me off. Hey I root for a baseball team that hasn't had a winning season in 12 years!

Do I qualify as a "true fan"? I'm sitting here in my Steelers sweatshirt as I type this. It was an intentional choice. Need to take a shot at the AFC championship loser? Fire away! I've been a fan since before the glory days of the 70's. Before Noll, before Bradshaw and Franco and Mean Joe. Back when the the Steelers were pretty wretched. I was a fan through the Super Bowl years of the mid to late 70's. I was a fan when they fell on hard times in the 80's and the Cowher era from the '90's to today. There are days when they drive me crazy but there's never a day when I'm not a Steeler fan. Even after 20 years in Buffalo Bills country (and I love the Bills too!) if you cut me I bleed Black and Gold.

(You'll have to pardon me but it struck me that there's a religious connection here too. I feel compelled to add it but I promise to keep it short).

Despite their shortcomings, despite their failures, despite the up and down nature of our relationship I love the Steelers. Just the same way God loves us. Not a bad model to follow.

(OK religious segment over. But think about it OK? There I feel better.)

Our kid QB is going to get better. We've got a very fine team and a bright future. It's good to be a Steelers fan (Hey we could be 49ersfans!)

Now I just gotta wait till Pirates spring training opens up.

Peace

Sabbath Summit

Ok this may be a new record. Four posts in a single week. No, now that I think of it I did more than this last year(oops two years ago!) when I was in Minneapolis. Still a pretty good start. Let's see how long I can keep it up.

The big thing this week has been the trip to Estes Park CO and the YMCA of the Rockies for the Sabbath Summit for diocesan youth ministry coordinators. It was an amazing 5 days. The Rockies are astounding all by themselves, although at 8,000+ feet I may have been breathless for reasons other than the scenery.

The purpose of the Summit was several fold:
First as a sabbath time for diocesan youth leaders. Just a time away to relax and hopefully get a little time with the big youth leader in the sky. I can tell you that a lot of folks did a LOT of just plain sleeping. Which they apparently needed. There was also worship and a chance for a limited form of spiritual direction. We had a wonderful group of people there to help us through the various "things" that were offered (virtually all of which were optional. You did what worked for you). Body prayer and centering prayer were offered along with more traditional forms of worship.
Second it was a chance to discuss the underlying concepts of the sabbath which grew out of a project called the Youth Ministry Spirituality Project. (I've added a link to their page at the bottom of this posting) 8 years of work with various congregations from a variety of denominations all over the country have resulted in some very interesting thoughts in integrating spirituality with youth ministry. We've already started using some of the ideas here in the diocese and are looking forward to doing more.
There was some really great music, some fabulous people, a great chance for those of us doing diocesan youth work to meet and network.

Now you may be saying "That's pretty spiffy for all you diocesan types. What about the rest of us?" Well this was always meant to grow and spread. It is our hope that we can bring this experience in some form to youth leaders/ministers at every level. How exactly that will happen is still up the air. But it's coming, trust me. When it happens I hope lots of folks will be interested in experiencing a sabbath for themselves.

Peace

A quick word about Colorado

I want to take a minute to comment on something I noticed everywhere I went in Colorado. Every single person, without fail, was polite, helpful and a joy to know. From the TSA people at the Denver airport, to the shopkeepers and clerks in Estes Park, to all the staff at the YMCA of the Rockies, EVERYONE greeted me with a smile and a warm hello. I was thanked repeatedly and wished a "Good day".

Here's the kicker - even the toll booth workers on the thruway were polite and cheerful. Given that I rarely get more than a grunt from NYS toll booth workers it was refreshing.

I think we should work on infecting the rest of the nation with this Colorado pleasantness.

Thank you Colorado I enjoyed my visit!

Peace.

What a Long Strange Trip...part deux

So after the fun and all of the Summit it's time to come down and get back to real life. I've decided that Real Life is overrated.

So I hop in the van and ride back down the mountain, again about a two hour drive. I arrive at the US Airways check in, stand in line and tell the nice lady when she asks that I'm headed to Dulles, then Buffalo. Oh, you must be on a United flight, we don't fly to Dulles. HUH?!?!?!?!

See my itinerary at the very top reads US Airways but in the little print it says "Flight operated by United". Seems they have some kind of deal to swap passengers back and forth. Which is fine but guess where the United check in is? Who said the other end of the terminal? Give yourself a gold star! So off I truck. I get to the United gates and do the computer check in. The machine spits out ONE boarding pass, not the two I'm expecting. I ask the attendant. Don't worry you'll get one from the gate agent. Ok, weird but OK I guess. So off I go to security. Make my way through the line and "You've been selected". For what? Extra security screening! One of my companions suggested it was my Navy issue black watch cap that made me look suspicious (Thanks Brian!) So off I go to be patted down, hand wanded for metal, and have all my bags searched. For the record the security people were polite and clearly explained everything. Highest marks to the TSA. In fact they were so efficient that I came out just behind the folks who had been in line behind me to start with! We all had a good laugh. Rode the train to my concourse and waited for the gate agent. About a half an hour. She shows up and informs me (very politely) that I don't have an actual seat on the plane at that moment. Seems they're overbooked by 10 (the next gate over was overbooked by 26!) and they'd work on finding me a seat. Great! So I sat with Jon and Carla and just muttered for about 10 minutes. At which point, voila! I had a seat. YAY! Now I flip on my cellphone so I can call my lady wife and tell her. I have a message waiting. From her. It's snowing like crazy and could I just get a hotel room in Buffalo when I arrive? Otherwise we'll be on the road till about midnight in the lake effect snows. No fun. Meanwhile the gate agent begins to announce that they'll give a free hotel room for the night to anyone who wishes to take a bump. Plus a free airflight voucher. And I begin to laugh. I think Jon thought the pressure had gotten to me at that point. I explained and we all agreed I had to get bumped! So I went up and took the bump. I'll spare you the tedious details except to say that everyone was very nice and very efficient and I ended up at the Double Tree hotel about 20 minutes away. Had dinner and hit the sack.

Oh did I mention my flight the next morning was 6:15 AM? So my alarm went off at 3:45AM. Showered and went down to catch the shuttle. Ummm, why does the little sign say to sign up in advance for the shuttle? Turns out since I was alone it was no problem but for a moment my blood pressure must have spiked. Now the shuttle doesn't leave till 4:30 and it's a twenty minute ride followed by security with a 5:45 boarding time so this is do-able but a little tight.

Except the shuttle doesn't leave till 4:40.
And the first security gate I go to (there are two at Denver, at ...you guessed it opposite ends of the terminal) is closed.
When I get to the other one guess what?


I GET SELECTED AGAIN!!!!!!!! I kid you not. And the line is longer than yesterday for some bizarre reason. (The cutest little girl, about 3 years old was being screened with her daddy right behind me. Standing there with her little arms extended out from her sides. She was very brave) Again very polite and efficient. And I'm through security!!!!!

And I realize I never checked what gate I'm at. And there are NO monitors on this side of the security area just the train to the concourses! AAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGH!!!!!

THINK, THINK, THINK! All gates for an airline are together so check the concourse map for United.....YES!!!!!! Concourse B. Onto the train, off to the gate, onto the plane! YES!

Not quite finished though. There was:

Having gotten up so early I didn't get breakfast. And United was willing to SELL me a breakfast sandwich for like $8. Pay for airline food? I think not.

Then there was the near fight between two adult women about an hour into the flight. They simmered down.

And my seat was in the absolute last row. You know the ones that don't recline...right by the bathroom.

Then getting to Dulles with not enough time to stand in the rather long lines at the food places to get a meal before boarding time (good thing I grabbed all that junk food from the Summit and stuck it in my backpack!)

But in the end I got home, and was greeted by the smiling face I love the best. And my lady wife drove me home.

Where I had dinner and collapsed!
Peace.

What a Long, Strange trip it's been.....

With apologies to the Grateful Dead

Just got back from the Sabbath Summit at Estes Park CO. This was a great chance for diocesan youth leaders to gather and pray and think and be with God. Very cool.

But the travel at either end...............


Let's start at the very beginning (a very good place to start). My flight out of Buffalo was scheduled for 7:50 AM (actually I thought it was 8:05 but it had been moved up). So my lady wife dropped me off just before 7 AM. Made it through security in a twinkle and was sitting waiting at the gate. Then word comes. Fog in NYC. My flight goes to LaGuardia then catch a flight to Denver. It's pushed back. And pushed back. And the pilot of our plane comments that the computer shows visibility listed as ZERO and he'd never in all the years he'd flown EVER seen such a listing on the computer! Great!

Eventually I'm told that even if we took off right now I'm never gonna make my connection. OK, I'm a fair and reasonable kinda guy, it's not their fault, so what can we do? Answer, as it turns out is, not much. Seems since it's Martin Luther King weekend and a three day holiday everybody is going to Colorado to ski. There are not available seats out of Pittsburgh, Chicago or Charlotte. The first available seat is on a 6 PM flight out of Pittsburgh. To get there they can put me on a 3 PM flight out of Buffalo. It's now about 9 AM.

Can I send a quick note to the folks at NFTA who run the Greater Buffalo International Airport? You have one damn boring airport. Pittsburgh, Denver, Dulles are all MUCH more fun to be stuck in for 6 long hours. I'm thinking we need to work on this. Really.

The flight to Pittsburgh went smoothly. I had about a two hour layover, then onto the flight to Denver. Smooth sailing.

Now at the other end all the arrangments are in the toilet. And for some reason my cellphone won't hold a signal for any of the folks I'm to meet. One of them (Yay Silvestre!)sends me a text message. (I didn't know I could receive text messages. It was very cool) and told me that someone would meet me in baggage claim. Great! Umm, no wait...which baggage claim? There are four of them at Denver and they're in pairs at opposite ends of this very large terminal. Finally I find my connection and the other two folks also arriving late join us and we're off.

For a two hour drive to Estes Park. It's now about 9 PM Mountain time. I will skip over turning the wrong way and having to back up an on ramp we didn't want to be on. (Heck I thought it was the right place to turn as well). Once off the interstate and onto the winding roads up the mountains we almost hit a coyote. Don't know who was more surprised us or him. Finally arrived around 11 PM, bedraggled and exhausted. Said hello to a few folks that I knew, gave them the short version and asked where my room was.

I'll tell you about the Summit later.

And I'll tell you about the trip HOME in the next post!

I can hear Jerry and the boys singing....

Peace

How's your Investments?

This is my January column from "ChurchActs" the diocesan newspaper of the Diocese of WNY


Well it’s the start of the year. That’s always a good time to sit back and review the year gone by with an eye towards the year to come. I want to talk to our youth about their investments. (Edit: All this applies to the adults too!)

By the way this column has nothing to do with money.

Now back to your investments. 2005 is just getting underway and I want you to spend a little time thinking about how you invest your time. Because how you invest your times is also the measure for how you invest your life. For most of us the “portfolios” that hold our investments of time are self, Family, Work (in your case School), Church and Other. Other includes all the stuff we do because we choose to, hobbies, sports, social activities and things like that.
So spend a little time looking at how your invest your time. Take a serious moment and think of how much time you actually invest in the average day, week, month and year in each category. Be honest, hey no one’s going to see this but you. Don’t try to fudge the figures if you don’t like the way the numbers are coming out. That’s part of the exercise.
While you’re doing that let me play investment advisor for you. So let’s look at the options:

Self – All of us need to take the time to take care of our selves. That means physically, mentally and spiritually. Even Jesus took time during his very short adult ministry to go off by himself and get away from the crowds. With your physical self-investment are you investing in good food, some exercise? In the mental section are you looking for new challenges or allowing your mind to stay in the same comfortable neighborhood. Spiritually if someone asked you about your personal relationship with God what would you say? Sunday morning worship can only be a small portion of this investment.

Family – Some families function really well, some don’t function at all, a lot of others just muddle through. You probably know where yours fits. So the next question is how much do you invest here. It’s too easy in our society to just blow off the importance of family. I’ve never heard of someone losing by investing heavily in this portfolio. There’s risk here for some of you, enormous risk. But the potential returns not only in the short term but in long term too are just too good to pass up. Your siblings may be a pain and your parents may be totally Uggghh but they are your family. And there’s an amazing long-term track record for this one.

Work/School – To be honest you don’t get a lot of choice on this one. The question for you is what kind of quality investment do you want this to be? When I was in school someone said to me “Don’t think of it as something that’s being forced upon you, think of it as something they owe you. Demand that they deliver and deliver in a useful form”. It changed the quality of my investment in this portfolio.

Other – Here’s all the other stuff, the sports, the music, the X-box, the hanging at the mall, the hobbies, et cetera. In our society this portfolio gets a lot of attention. Sometimes too much attention. The Other category can take over our whole lives, dominating our schedules and forcing everything else to the back. If there’s one portfolio to trim it’s almost always this one.

Church – and if there’s one that commonly gets shortchanged it’s this one. This one gets whatever is left over, and let’s be honest that’s usually very little. Church is more than just that interminable hour (or more) on Sunday morning. It’s part of the spiritual portion of our Self portfolio. It’s the part of our investments that directs us away from ourselves and out into the world. To care for someone else and their needs rather than to spend all our time on our own.

So here’s my investment advice. Take a hard look at how much is invested in Other and cut it. Don’t eliminate it because some of it is tied into your Self portfolio. Take the extra and invest it where you’re under-invested. My bets are those are Your Church, Your Family and Your Self . In the end you’ll discover those investments are a lot more important than all the other stuff in your life. Along the way you’ll probably also discover less tension, less craziness and more joy in your life. Proof positive of the quality of those investments.

Peace

Not a great start

Well I was hoping for a great start to the new year. Not sure this is what I had in mind. Had a bad meal at a local restaurant and spent most of Thursday night/Friday morning being sicker than sick. Just nasty. 13 hours sleep seems to have put me right but it'll take a couple days to get back up to speed I'm afraid. Such fun.

There was an upside as well. When I was at the re-convening of our diocesan convention I had two people tell me how much they enjoy reading my columns in our newspaper "ChurchActs" (which I also publish here - I'll get the January one up this week). In fact one lady said she had read the December column (about Peter walking on the water) over and over and over again then sent it on to her brother because she like it so much.

Let me tell you I immediately began to feel a whole lot more chipper!

Hope you all enjoy this stuff as well.

Peace

And a New Year too

Just realized that the end of the year had blown right by and not a new post in site. Mea culpa. This is going to be an interesting year. Lots of youth activities planned, a major funding program to move forward, the Episcopal Youth Event in Kentucky, camps! Including the return of Senior High after a one year sabbatical. There there are the little things like my daughter entering her senior year at HS and college visits and on and on and on.....

I'm hoping that this will be a great year. There's so many things to do and so many projects I want to undertake and get rolling. This is a great year for anyone who has been thinking about getting involved because we'll have lots of things for you to pick and choose among.

Here's to a great year for youth ministry. And more posts on the blog!
Peace

Youth Missioner as sports star (?)

I mentioned before that I play indoor soccer during the white months of the year. Well last night was the final date in this session so it was playoff time! Why we have playoffs in a league that doesn't keep standings, and you get nothing for "winning" the playoffs is a puzzle to us all but there you go.

Our first playoff game (20 minutes instead of the usual 50 minutes, another irritation) we won 11-2. Yours truly picked up a goal and an assist. Also a whole load of bruises on my back because the opposing goalkeeper decided he didn't want me to play in front of him (I was playing completely legally) So he begun pushing and smacking me in the back, at one point pushing me the whole way to the front of the penalty area (that's about 15 feet). Have to admit scoring the goal on him felt good.

Then we had an hour off while other teams played.

Second game we won 5-0 and I got another goal and assist. The assist was a very spiffy little back heel pass that did EXACTLY what I wanted it to do. That so rarely happens.

The third game started 10 minutes after the second one ended, against a team that had about a half an hour's rest and was significantly younger than my guys. Didn't look good. Then we jumped out to a 2-0 lead! Didn't last. We ran out of gas by half time but never gave up. We lost 11-7. I contributed nothing to the score sheet and not a whole lot at all. I was EXHAUSTED! This morning my body is extremely unhappy with me in fact.

Seems to think we're old or something. I haven't told it yet......



I'm signing up for the next session!
Peace

Laughter in the church

I had one of those "moments" at church yesterday. No, not a senior moment although they are starting to crop up with more frequency these days. It was the kind of moment that some people will remember for a long time and the kind of moment when I realized that something had changed for me.

I was one of the lay readers for the 10 AM service

(quick note for any non-Episcopalians in the crowd - during our service we read from both the OT and NT plus a psalm and the Gospel. The first three are read by lay people, one of whom is usually also serving as a chalice bearer (oops more jargon - the person who offers the wine to everyone at Communion) and so is vested. For us that's a black cassock with a flowing white surplice over it. The kind with the big swoopy sleeves)

Anyway I walked from my seat to the lectern to do my readings. This means walking by the choir in their pews. The end of each choir stall has a carved wooden fleur de lis on top (kind of three pronged pointy thing). As I walked by the first stall my sleeve billowed out and snagged. I didn't notice till it pull me up short. I stopped, backed up and freed myself. The congregation gave a quiet chuckle. Then on the very next pew my sleeve did it AGAIN! This got quite the laugh and a big smile from me. And the thought that I had changed.

There was a time, not all that long ago when I would have been mortified at what happened in church yesterday. Church was a solemn, dignified, serious place that had no place for light-heartedness. People talking, children making noise, heck even people smiling bugged me. What did they think this was? Some kind of romper room? God was here and God was one tight lipped, deadly serious kinda hombre who didn't want any messing around when we were here bowing and scraping and begging His pardon and maybe, if it wouldn't be too much trouble, and I know I have no right to ask, let alone think you might be listening, but maybe Sir could you do me this small favor?

That was back when I really didn't much care for church or most of the people who seemed to attend.

Today I think maybe God laughed along with His people. This is still pretty serious stuff - sin and reconciliation and forgiveness and all the stuff that goes along with it. Somewhere along the line it dawned on me that maybe this is stuff I'm supposed to be happy about. Our Book of Common Prayer talks about the "celebration" of the Holy Eucharist. For a lot of years growing up I don't remember much celebrating going on, more like a whole lot of "You're darn lucky we let even get a sniff of this, so get down on your knees and be grateful". I don't deny that there is an element of that present. I don't deserve God's love or his Grace or to share in his Communion. But He wants me there anyway. And He let's me have it anyway.

And that seems like something to celebrate, to smile and laugh a little. If you show up in my congregation and spend the whole service chattering you'll probably still get a look or even a word from me. But I love the sound of babies in church, I enjoy watching children learn to grow comfortable in the pew and at the rail. I truly love the chance to read a lesson like yesterday's that spoke of the joy of being with God and the wonderous things that He can make happen.

And I enjoyed being reminded not to be quite such a stuck up sticky beak and to remember to laugh with God.

Peace

I Have a Problem With The Bible

(This is my column from the December issue of ChurchActs, the newspaper of the Diocese of WNY)

This column comes with a warning. I’m about to say something that might upset some folks. So I’m asking you to stay with me till I can explain, OK? It’s not as bad as it sounds I promise. I’m just trying to head off angry, torch bearing mobs at my doorstep. So here we go:

I have a problem with the Bible.
(Take a deep breath, it’s not what you think I promise)

Actually I have to admit I only have a problem with some bibles. Some translations have little headlines at the start of chapters or stories. My problem is with the one in Matthew chapter 14 that inevitably says, “Jesus walks on the water”. (Oops that just spiked some folk’s blood pressure too. I’m almost there I promise). You see I would change it to “Peter walks on the water”.

I’m not denying that Jesus walked on the water. But Jesus is God. That God is capable of the miraculous is wonderful but is kind of….. expected, right? What’s not expected is when Peter climbs out of the boat. That’s astounding. This story has always drawn me in. So I’ve spent a fair amount of time thinking about Peter climbing out of that boat.

Peter isn’t suddenly a super hero, walking on water is not some new power or gift that he’s given. There’s a good chance that Peter couldn’t even swim. Recreational swimming is a relatively uncommon activity until the last century. While he’s comfortable on the water, even during a storm, Peter knows the danger facing everyone on the boat in this story. The boat used was probably designed for fishing. It was designed to perform specific duties under specific circumstances. Being out in the storm is probably a bit of a challenge. Peter has the skills to get them through this and deliver them safely to the other side. Strength, experience and training make Peter the right person at the right time in the storm.

So while they fight their way through the storm in the early morning hours Jesus comes across the water. Everyone in the boat knows that this can’t be happening. They are terrified by the battering of the storm, they’re tired and now this.

Now we’re back to Peter. Note that at first even Peter isn’t sure what’s going on. His first words are “IF it is you Lord…” Then he does what is probably the bravest thing he’s ever done in his life to that point. The fisherman who probably can’t swim, who knows that people can’t walk on water, that they sink and drown, climbs out of the boat. All of this in response to a single word from Jesus. No fancy promises, no big explanations about how his divine will will keep Peter safe. Jesus says “Come” and Peter tosses everything he knows aside and climbs over the gunwale.
And the miraculous happens. Peter finds that his foot doesn’t sink, the he can walk on the water. His mind is focussed on Jesus, on the “Come”. And it works. Now I figure that Jesus must be standing a little ways away because we’re told that Peter walks to Jesus, not just gets out and stands next to him. So Peter takes a couple steps. He's probably starting to get a little comfortable with this whole thing when he gets distracted. The storm is still going while all this happens and Peter’s mind suddenly starts thinking about what is happening. Jesus reaches out to Peter, brings him back to the boat and calms the storm.

Think about it. When Peter has his attention centered on Jesus he is capable of doing things he knows he can’t do. In defiance of his experience, logic and common sense he can do it. But when he let’s his mind wander suddenly things go wrong. For me that’s the lesson from this story. We need to remember the lesson of Peter climbing out of the boat. We climb out when Jesus calls us and we can do the miraculous. When we stay locked in on Jesus we will be able to continue doing the miraculous. When we let other things distract us we can end in over our heads very quickly. The good news is that at that moment Jesus always has a hand out for us.

Now who do I talk to about editing the Bible?

Peace

And now I'm back

Wow, things got away from me again. Hard to believe it's been weeks since I dropped a note here. Lots of work/ministry things getting in the way (of just about everything)

Had a very cool Thanksgiving week. My fabulous sister in law got tickets for the Steelers/Redskins game through her employer so for the first time in my life I saw my hometown football team in person. From 9 rows away from the field. Peggy rocks!

The game wasn't much to write home about, neither were the $6 beers. SIX BUCKS!!!! But the stadium was great and it was fun hanging out with my brother and his fabulous wife (did I mention that PEGGY ROCKS! ?) The only bad part was my youngest brother was supposed to join us. Didn't happen so Peggy (who is just about the coolest person on the face of the planet in my opinion although her taste in men is, well.......) managed to outhaggle a ticket scalper for the fourth ticket.

Actually we had a great time, and my sister in law is very cool, but since I know my brother checks this blog periodically it's fun to razz him in a semi-public place.

Back to more serious topics later this week.
Peace

Voting Day

Rachel and Kaitlin - representing young people from WNY! 

Today is the day. If you're a registered vote make sure you get out and do your thing. I know everyone is saying "This is the most important election of my lifetime" but I disagree. EVERY election is important and the presidential election is always important. Assuming that our schedules allow my daughter will walk into the booth with me just as she's done since she was a tiny little girl. Next year she'll register to vote herself and in 2006 she'll enter by herself for the first time. I'll probably get all choked up when she does.

But being involved and making your voice heard is something that can start happening right now if you're a young person in the Diocese of WNY. See those two young ladies up at the top? They represent YOU. Rachel was named the youth rep to Diocesan Council by Bishop Michael at convention this past weekend. And Kaitlin got the most votes of ANYONE as she was elected to be a deputy to the next General Convention.

While they are both still teenagers they are now leaders in the diocese. You can do the same thing. Does your vestry have a youth seat on it? (If the answer is no ask them why the heck not! And keep asking till they create one. If they get mad send them to me!) Join Youth Commission. That's who makes the recommendation to the Bishop for the D Council youth rep and makes the decisions on what kinds of youth ministry we do. Find out when your deanery council meets and stop by, same thing for D Council. If you feel like the adults aren't listening to you ask yourself the question - what am I doing to make them listen? Remember David killed Goliath when he was only a kid (heck Adam was in charge from the day he was born!)

If you're not willing to say anything don't complain if no one pays you any attention. And if you don't vote...don't gripe!
Peace

A couple of thoughts upon my return

Lord, it's good to be home!

Over the last three weeks I've been home (meaning there for the whole day not having to travel to some event or place outside of the normal routine) about 4 days. I actually get to stay home for most of this week! I'm excited. I also have a LOT of chores to catch up on.

Things I discovered along the way:

Newark NJ is a puzzle to me. I've visited there several times and have gotten turned around both upon entering and leaving the city. Maybe someday I'll figure it out.

Angola NY seems to have the same effect on me! But I think I've finally figured that one out.

Had a moment of absolute panic on the drive home from NJ when I was sure that a PA state trooper was going to pull me over. He had his radar aimed right at me, checked it, flipped on his lights and pulled out onto the Interstate. Turned out he was after the guy right behind me. Be still my pounding heart!

I am happy to announce that the Province II youth network has taken its first step after many years lying dormant. I met with most of the diocesan youth coordinators and had a GREAT time! We're looking forward to planning more "stuff" in the future.

Now I'm home and enjoying sleeping in my own bed. All is right in the world.
Peace

What a long strange trip....

My apologies to the Grateful Dead and any Deadheads out there for hijacking their title but wow! Today is the first day in 12 that I haven't been elsewhere or traveling to and from elsewhere! A quick summary so you know what's been happening:

October 6 - Flew to Baltimore MD for a meeting with the provincial youth ministry coordinators. We meet twice a year for an intensive couple of days of planning, praying and playing. It's a fabulous group of people that I enjoy hanging out with, being inspired and challenged by. Baltimore is a very cool city. If you ever get the time make sure you get a ticket for the water taxi that will take you to all the spots to visit around the harbor. October 10 flew home

October 11 Got to sleep in my own bed, had a birthday dinner with my lady wife (her birthday was actually the NEXT day but....well you'll see)then drove to Buffalo to spend the night at Bishop Michael's (and Carol's too) house because....

October 12 Rode with the Bish plus a couple other diocesan staff types to London Ontario for the Quint diocese day meeting. Bishops and their staffs from WNY and Rochester in the US and Niagara, Huron and Toronto in Canada gather once a year to share ideas and laughs. (a secret - Canadian bishops are some of the funniest people on the planet. Don't know why. They just are.) Drove home the same day.

October 13Flew to Washington DC to be trained as a coordinator for the Journey to Adulthood program. Met some great folks, including one old friend and learned some good stuff. Brief plug - flew on one of the new small airlines, independence Air, and had a very good experience. RT Buffalo to DC was UNDER $140. End of plug. Took a whirlwind tour of some of DC, saw the Washington, Jefferson, Lincoln, WWII, Korean, and Viet Nam memorials at varying distances. Saw the Capitol dome and the White House in the distance. Got very wet because it rained and stormed. Flew home October 16

So I'm a tired puppy. Good meetings every single one of them, learned some good stuff, talked with some very cool people and came home with new skills and ideas for WNY.

I just need some sleep!
Peace

And off I go....

I'm double posting today because I'm going to be away for a while. Part of my calling has been responsibilities at both the provincial and national church. So I'll be off dealing with some of those responsibilities for most of the next two weeks. I hope that I'll be able to keep you up to date on where I am and what I'm seeing but there's not guarantee. My third trip is to Washington DC to get some training in Journey to Adulthood. That will be pretty cool too.

So don't worry if you don't see anything posted here for a while. I'll check in as I can.
Peace

So What Happened?

(The following is my column from the October issue of the diocesan newspaper "ChurchActs".)

If you’ve already read the annual camp article you’ve noticed it’s short by one whole camp. Senior High 2004 was cancelled. It was a terribly difficult decision that has sent a variety of ripples out into the diocesan youth ministry. All three of our camps had troubles this year with attendance at some all time lows. The most commonly heard question is: What happened?
In simplest terms Senior High was cancelled because not enough young people signed up. To justify the amount of money involved and the time invested by the staff there has always been a minimum number required. That minimum has changed from year to year based on a variety of parameters. This year we set the lowest minimum ever and still missed by approximately 15%.
Why did attendance drop at all three camps? We’re still looking at that question. What’s coming up in the discussions are some interesting points. There are two obvious problems that need to be addressed right up front:

Communication – It appears we fell victim to the oldest advertising mistake in the book. It’s the one that starts with “Everybody knows about…” While many people have some general knowledge about camp we quite simply failed to move that general knowledge to what’s called Top of Mind Awareness. Without that awareness we became just another item floating around in the very busy lives of our young people and their parents. Discussions are already underway on how to fix this challenge. It includes more materials going out to campers and their families, to the congregations and to the leaders (both lay and clergy) in those congregations. As always our best advertising is our young people telling all their friends what a great time they had. Look for the information, ask if it’s arrived (in a month or so) and stay in touch with me for all the details. Please remember that there are e-mail newsletters available for youth and leaders (with an parents one being discussed) and the diocesan youth web site is always there (www.eyouthwny.homestead.com)

Deadlines – The problem here is that no one seems to take them seriously. Consequently paper work dribbles in and leaves all the camp directors in a serious bind trying to make plans. The deadlines exist because we need to be able to tell the camps, in advance, how many people are coming. They need to know so they can order enough food to feed us and make sure there’s enough staff available to help in some cases. But that ‘s only the beginning. The camp directors need to know so we can make sure that we have the right number of staff, the right amount of materials and have activities appropriate for the size group coming. The needs of a camp of 95 youth can be VERY different than the needs of 45 youth. We try to get the applications out as soon as possible. This year you could even register online at the web site. Camps get cancelled because the time comes when we have to decide if we have enough young people or not. That’s the deadline. All I can ask is that you please, please, PLEASE take the deadlines seriously. If there’s an unavoidable problem then get in touch with the appropriate camp director so we know what’s going on and can help.
So where do we go from here? The camp directors, the Youth Commission and other interested parties are looking at everything to try and insure that our camps return in 2005 stronger than ever. Problems with how the applications were put together this year will be fixed. Communications will be improved and expanded. We’re looking at possible changes to expand the number of activities available at Senior High. The list goes on and on.
How can you help? Talk with other young people and adults about improving the whole camp experience. Pass along any ideas to the other camp directors or me. If you love camp then talk it up among your friends. If someone wants to talk to you about the Bishop Harold Robinson Society please listen. The Robinson Society is designed to help us insure the financial stability of our youth ministries.
Our diocesan youth camps will be back next year. We hope to keep EVERYTHING good about them, add more good stuff and minimize the problems. Like so many things it’ll work best if we can work towards being “One Church – Embracing and Living into the Dream of God”.

And now for something completely different

Since this blog is supposed to cover a wide variety of the things going on in my life I'll include this:

Indoor soccer score Team Gray 5 Team Navy 5

Soccer season has started again and we played our first game last night (at 9PM my least favorite game time - tough to haul this old carcass up and down the pitch at any kind of speed at that hour)

I am happy to report that I a)did not fall down OR hurt myself, b)did not embarrass myself playing and c) had several good chances to score. None of which I converted. Ah well, first week. Much like the Bills last week we lost on the last play of the game after leading the whole time. I wasn't out there so it wasn't my fault.

I must confess that soccer sometimes brings out the worst in me. It's tough to remember one's faith and belief's when some rotten SOB has just whacked you, tripped you or made you look like an idiot. I will admit that I will, upon occasion push back, once in a while make a stab for a ball that I know is going to be late just to make the other guy "stumble" (I almost always help them back up). I almost never make anyone look like an idiot. Well anyone other than me of course.

There is a way to be competitive and still stay within a life in faith. It's that old fashioned concept of fair play. So I try hard to do just that. If anyone asks I just tell them I'm "old school".

Peace

Thots from the news

Sinead O'Connor 

Saw an article today about Sinead O'Connor complaining that she's constantly made fun of in the media. Apparently it makes her feel bad and gets in the way of her being "a little old lady" (her words) and doing her music and stuff.

Now I suppose I feel some sympathy for anyone whose life is constantly scrutinized by the media (though now much) and I do feel more sympathy for those whose time has passed but the media won't give them a break. But what on earth does Ms. O'Connor really expect? She's always chosen to "go her own way" from her extremely short hair cut (see above) to her never to be forgotten assault on the photo of the Pope. Her off stage antics have been a bit "different" as well.

Assuming she is not, as she maintains, crazy there remains the question of responsibility. How much responsibility do we all carry for how we behave and the reaction that creates in the people around us? Maybe I'm just cranky but if you choose to live outside the norms of society I believe you have to accept that society is going to talk trash about you. I'm not saying it's right but that it's inevitable. If you decide to climb up on stage, if you decide to place yourself in the spotlight, if you decide NOT to dress and act like everyone else and you decide to do something controversial why would any reasonable person be surprised that the world takes notice? The response is almost as inevitably that we should be able to do whatever we want as long as we're not hurting someone else. And why is it anyone else's business what I do or how I live? My answer is that when you CHOOSE to put yourself center stage then you have to accept the consequences of the action.

I don't know if Sinead is nuts or not. To be honest I don't particularly care. But what can she expect after this lovely list of life accomplishments:

publicly defended the Irish Republican Army
Criticized U2 - who helped her get started in the recording biz
Refused to allow the U.S. National anthem to be played before her concerts in the U.S.!
The whole Pope photo thing
Somehow was "ordained" a Catholic priest and changed her name to Mother Bernadette Mary but quit when she discovered she couldn't handle being celibate,
Declared she was a lesbian
A year later married a man.
Is currently the spokesperson for an anti head lice among school children campaign.

Some people will say I'm being cruel or even un-Christian. That's not my intent. It comes back to the "R" word, responsibility. Somehow none of this is her fault, somehow she's being picked on.

So let me offer a word of advice and assistance. Sinead - if you really want us all to go away and stop talking about you then become what you say you want to become. No one wants to see a "little old lady" in the news. LOLs (as we call them here in the States) are lovely human beings who virtually never make the news because they keep to themselves and live their lives quietly.

As the Good Book says - Go and do likewise.

Peace

The time has come to choose

( The following is the text of my sermon delivered Sunday Sept 20, 2004 at St. Peter's Episcopal Church, Westfield NY.)

Whenever I prepare for a Sunday morning like this one I take a look at the scripture readings for the day to see if they have any inspiration for me. After wading my way through some pretty grim stuff I found a phrase that grabbed me in the Gospel. It was the reminder that we can not serve two masters. When a phrase or passage grabs me like that I begin to look at how that speaks to youth ministry both here at St. Peter’s and in our diocese.

Our young people today are called by two masters. The first master is the culture that surrounds our young people, a culture that is shallow, self centered and insidious. It wants us all to believe that we will gain happiness through things. Let me give you an example: There’s a TV promo on the Jamestown cable system promoting cable TV versus satellite. A pretty teenage girl who complains she has so much homework it’s interfering with watching her favorite TV shows! But her friends told her that if she just got a new DVR then she’d never miss another program. You see silly things like homework keep trying to get in the way of the important things, like the new season of Survivor.

The other master is or should be their church as the expression of their lives in faith. I worry that the voice of this second master calls too softly to be heard for many of our young people. Here’s another example - a congregation I knew very well. They had a full Sunday school program for all ages where they did nice classes teaching their young people all the stories of the Bible. When the kids were a little older they got confirmed and became acolytes. But they had this problem that once their kids became teens they just kind of drifted off. I know of one young man who went off to church camp and came back really fired up about his faith. He came back with a lot of questions and wanted to talk about them and how it related with his life in High school. Unfortunately for him the curriculum for that year didn’t include discussion groups. You see they had this book they were supposed to read and talk about. So after a couple years of getting pumped up about his faith at camp and deflated at church he just stopped going. His parents fought with him for a while but in the end it was just easier this way. Astoundingly that young man grew up to become the Youth Missioner for the Episcopal Diocese of WNY. I’d love to tell you that my home congregation was an anomaly. Except that the Episcopal congregation in the town where I went to college, a parish that was right across the street from almost half the dormitories on campus, that sat just a few lots away from the largest off campus student housing complex in the area never made the smallest effort to reach out to those young people in the 4 years that I spent in the community.

The question that faces us today is how do we bring the voice of faith into our young people’s live, how do we communicate that faith clearly so that they will not only hear us but want to listen.

I spend a lot of time studying youth ministry and I’ve seen lots of approaches. Some folks look for the perfect curriculum or program. I call it the magic box syndrome. Once you find the magic box you open it and all your problems are solved. Then there are the places that will do what ever it takes to have the youth show. They have lots of fun "events". The idea appears to be that if you can get the youth into the vicinity of church often enough they’ll catch faith along the way. Maybe it’ll rub off on them. There are the study intensive ideas and the mission intensive ideas. There’s books you can buy, and video series available for only 149.94. Maybe we need worship services with rock bands, or Taize chants or interpretive dance. Ways that engage our young people using music and video and computers so that we are speaking to them in the formats with which they are most comfortable.

The question arises however is that all that faith is? Another set of rules, another music video, another class, no matter entertainingly presented for them to sit through?

So the question becomes how do we make this second voice heard? We’ve tried different things over the years in our diocese. In 1948 this diocese opened Camp Carleton to help bring young people into a deeper relationship with God. For many adults today the memories from those camps are still vivid and form an important part of their growth as people of faith. If you grew up somewhere else, as I did, your memories may be of a different camp. Over the years our diocesan youth programs have had both highs and lows. The highs include the growth of camp program to include young people from elementary school to high school and camps that grew so large that there were waiting lists to get in. The lows include the closing of Camp Carleton in the 1970’s to the cancellation of Senior High conference this year.

In the four years that I’ve served as your diocesan youth missioner we’ve found ways to increase our outreach to our young people. Today we do more ministry with a smaller budget. There is now a diocesan youth choir, a diocese wide social event called the Bishop’s Ball, we’re exploring ideas for mission trips, the Journey to Adulthood program is up and running in some of our congregations. There are lots of other great programs and events being offered to young people in WNY. And they’re all great. But they’re not enough.

In my opinion one of the best "thinkers" in youth ministry over the last couple decades has been a guy by the name of Mike Yacconelli. Sadly for us Mike died earlier this year. Mike had this to say about the fight between faith and culture:
"We're attempting to convince the world how good Jesus is by how great we are. This is precisely how Madison Avenue sells toothpaste, automobiles, and underwear. People don't need any more images of success, wealth, and power; they're surrounded already. What they need are their sins forgiven. What they need is healing. What they need is love."

I believe that helping young people hear the voice of the true master is vitally important. Not because I think it’s the thing to do, or because I work for the church. I’ve seen study after study that shows that young people who are involved in their faith do better in life and have fewer problems. It’s NOT a magic bullet, there are plenty of young people involved at church who still get into trouble and have problems. But the numbers go down from the rest of the population. Why is that? Because they’re given something to compare to when they have to make decisions. They’re given the support they need, they’re given the love they need, they have at least the beginnings of a belief that someone, somewhere believes in them, is watching over them, someone cares about them. Those are gifts they can carry with them for the rest of their lives.

I don't believe that these gifts come from a program or a worship service or a video series. All those things can support the process but they are empty without...us. The greatest example of a life in faith, the greatest model that our young people can learn from is the one that surrounds them here.

Now this next part involves asking some uncomfortable questions. If we believe that a life in faith is important for our young people, if we believe that the voice they need to hear most clearly is the voice of divine love are we, the adults, willing to live that out in our own lives? As parents are we willing to say that church is more important than sports? Are we willing to say that our faith is important enough to us that we won’t park somewhere illegally, that we won’t fudge a story to avoid taking responsibility, that we will keep our promises to pay our pledge so the youth group has the funds to get the stuff they need even if it means NOT buying that new golf club? Are we willing to look across the aisle at the young person with the piercings and the tattoos and the weird hair cut and treat them as a child of God and a brother or sister in Christ?

Or is church really just a Sunday morning thing? Is it really separate from the rest of our lives and has no effect on the rest of the week? Which master do we hear most clearly in our own lives? Which voice do our young people see us following in our day to day lives? We can not serve two masters.

Let me tell you another story about how we can really make the voice of the true master heard to our young people. This is a true story about a young woman from here in WNY. We’ve changed a few details about the story, including her name, to protect her privacy. But she’s told me I can use this story. So let’s call her Lucy. Lucy was a pretty typical teenage girl. She was a outgoing, friendly girl from a small town very much like Westfield. She was into school and friends and church in her small town. Lucy had a warm, giving heart. It was that heart that caused her to ask her family if they would let a young man from her school live with them for a while. He had been having some troubles and had left home because of them. Her family agreed. The story takes a nasty turn here. The young man sexually assaulted her and left her pregnant. Can you imagine the hurt? Can you imagine the betrayal? Can you imagine the pain of having to tell her family? At that moment Lucy’s family wrapped her in their arms around her. Lucy’s church did the same and the young people that Lucy had come to know through diocesan events like camp and Happening did the same. Today Lucy is once again working towards her dreams, she’s become a leader among the youth and has even begun to tell this story herself. She’s also raising a beautiful little baby.

This is the vision of the church that our young need to see. They need a church that will do more than talk about forgiveness and healing and love. They need a church that will live out those ideals, not only on Sunday but every day. They need a church that understands who the master is and makes that master a part of everything we do.

There are challenges still ahead of us. But if you look beyond them you see what could happen in our churches and with our youth. If we refuse to let them stop us what might we find in the future? Churches that are growing, young people staying to continue to grow and mature, new energy in our congregations, new ministries, not simply for young people but new ministries of young people. Young people changing their lives, changing their congregation, changing their home town, changing their state and their nation. Changing the world. All because they heard the master’s voice. All because they knew the master’s voice. All because they obeyed the master’s voice.

We can not serve two masters. Because if we try we will love one and hate the other. Which master would we have our young people choose? Which master will they see us choose? Choose.

Peace

Thoughts on death - yeah, really

I'm behind on my entries but I've been struggling with how I should deal with this subject. I said earlier this year that I was going to address all the stuff going on in my life here. Talking about someone near to me dying wasn't on the agenda. Man plans, God laughs.

My uncle Nick died last week. He wasn't really my uncle, he was my godfather. I've called him uncle my entire life. After my dad died four years ago and my godmother died three years ago he and my mom became a couple. It was kind of weird but it was also kind of cool. He married my mom's oldest friend so they'd known each other for about 50 years. It was good for both of them.

I can't tell you that I was real close to Nick for most of my life. He lived in Arkansas and I lived in Pennsylvania. I probably only saw him a half dozen times in my life before he and my mom got together two plus years ago. One of them was when I was exactly one month old, at my baptism. In the last couple years I'd gotten to know him better and I'd come to like and respect him. In some ways he was just like my dad. In other ways they couldn't have been more different. My mom can be pretty orderly, Nick could be pretty free form. They were fun to watch together.

What sticks with me most is a ridiculous favorite line of his "I'm just a poor white Ukranian on a fixed income". It was after he passed away that I realized the really funny part of that line. Nick wasn't a wealthy guy in worldly terms. Yet there are few people I've known in this world who lived more richly. Even with some major medical problems he'd laugh and tell the most atrocious jokes and flirt with all the girls and dig into his pocket to slip me a little something when he thought I deserved it. He crocheted gorgeous blankets and just gave them away. He loved his children and his grandchildren. You were sure to hear the latest adventures of Rossie the youngest grandkid.

People keep asking me how I'm doing, and how my mother's doing. I guess we're doing OK. There's a part of me that hurts and I know there's nothing I can do about the pain. Instead of focussing on it I remember Nick as I've gotten to know him over the last couple years. I'll always treasure the Bible and Book of Common Prayer he and aunt Janet got me for baptism and confirmation. And there'll always be a special place in my heart for that "poor white Ukranian" that blew into my life and then suddenly disappeared.

I miss you Nick. And I love you.
Peace

Just some random thoughts

I'm trying desperately to get ready for two solid weeks of camp coming up. So naturally I have an uncontrollable desire to write something for my blog. Jimmy Buffett is jamming away in the background (Barometer Soup CD) and my brain feels like it's going to explode.

So here are some of the things that are on my mind:

Story in the Buffalo News today about an area soccer team made up of Yemeni-Americans. A youth team made up of kids born here in the States. They're being taunted and threatened, called terrorist and told to go back where they came from. How many times in American history do we have to live through this idiocy? How many of the youth and adults spreading this abuse are descendants of folks who lived through it when they arrived in this country? This is a national tradition that needs to end, now. It has no place in the 21st Century. Yes there were some Yemeni Americans from this town who were convicted for their association with Al Qaeda. Shall we return to the days when all Italians were painted with the brush of a Capone or Lucchese? (as only a single example)

As someone who is a small part American Indian may I remind you that you're all damn foreigners.

I'll probably explore this in more depth later but I remain puzzled by the "WHY" of body peircings and tattoos. I've asked a lot of folks who gotten a piercing or two (I'm talking about beyond an ear piercing or two) or tattoos. Allowing that folks who go whole hog (dozens of piercings or large portions of their bodies tattooed) are a different category (Are they?) I ask folks the simple question - Why? And the most common response is some variation on "I don't know".
For the record let me state that I'm terminally boring. Other than length I've had the same haircut since I was in 5th grade. I can't stand having ink on my fingers or hands so the concept of getting permanently added to my body is incomprehensible to me. And as for punching holes in my body......fuggehdibowdit. For most of life I wore a single piece of jewelry, a small silver disk with my initials on it on a silver chain. A gift from my wife. Today I've gone whole hog, I wear a gold wedding band on my left hand and an heirloom ring (which is actually steel I believe) on my right. I'm about as far from metrosexual as you can get. The best reasons I can think of for doing this to yourself (or a variety of other things) are pretty sure to tick off a lot of people. So I'm keeping my thoughts to myself. At least for the moment.

(JB just ended so I had to pop in a group called Cartoon from State College PA. Friend gave me the CD and I've made it one of my faves for years)

On a completely unrelated topic I've been thinking about what appears to the fundamental selfishness of our culture. It's amazing how much of what I see in advertising, music, pop culture is based on the concept of me, me, ME! Even more frightening is how much I see of the same idea creeping into the faith community. People who have no interest in the others in their faith community except as backdrop to their personal worship life. The list goes on. It's a destructive concept inside any culture because we can't live without one another. Try it, you can only use what you create yourself. So electricity (and everything that runs on it) is out, so are roads, any manufactured or produced product. You're left naked out in the middle of the woods somewhere. Not an attractive prospect for most of us. I'm worried about the growth of IM -ing and even blogging. Because while we may want to believe that this offers us "relationship" it's an essentially selfish relationship. Because we can turn it off any time we want, we can ban certain people so they can't even reach us.
There's a whole lot more to this concept than I have time for today. I still have all this work waiting for me.

Something else I'll want to dive into sometime in the future is the question of where faith and religion collide. But later. Maybe much later.

Meanwhile the music plays, and my thoughts wander...

Peace

Life in ministry

So why do you do this?

Why do you do a job that deals with teenagers? Why do you do a job with so little job security/pay? Why do you do a job that requires irregular hours, sometimes 24/7? Why do you do a job that makes some people wonder about you sometimes?

My first reaction when I’m asked these kinds of questions is usually “Beats the hell out of me”. If I’m really honest I don’t like working. I’d much rather play golf, ride my bike, read a book, walk in the woods, snuggle up with my lady wife, just about ANYTHING other than work.

It’s not a job without a downside. First there’s that whole work thing again. Second there are plenty of people who believe they know what needs to be done a whole lot better than I do. Money is a problem. I’m forced to do things I’m profoundly uncomfortable doing. Like talking about money. Or confronting people. Or failing.
Failure is not only an option it’s inevitable. Not every event will work. Not every lesson will get through. Not every young person will make the right choices. That last one is the hardest to deal with for me. No, that’s not right. The hardest part for me is that very often I don’t ever know if I’ve failed or not. It is the nature of ministry with young people that you don’t always see the product of the seed you plant. At 18 or so they’re gone. I see them occasionally but usually for just a moment. A quick hug and a hello. That seed may rest in them for 10 minutes or 10 years before it blooms. And that’s hard.

Of course when I’d doing the parts of my job I like I don’t consider it work.

Work is budgets, committees, phone calls, meetings, details, mass mailings, paperwork in all forms.

The work isn’t why I do this. I do this because of all the rest.

Why do I do this? Because:

I happen to like teenagers. And for reasons I don’t completely understand, they seem to like me.

I’ve never worked “for the money”. If I have enough to pay the bills with a little left over to go out with my family and friends then I have enough. I went for years and couldn’t tell you exactly how much I made. I couldn’t tell you right now how much I make. I make enough. And that’s enough.

The hours balance out. My schedule is flexible so if I work long hours today I can work short hours tomorrow.

Hell, people been wonderin’ about me for years! I’ve stopped worrying about it.

I can make a difference. Maybe it’s an ego thing, I don’t know. But all my life I’ve wanted to make a difference. Just for one person, or for a thousand. I spent 19+ years working as a radio DJ at 5 different radio stations in three different towns. Based on the reactions of my audience and my sponsors I was pretty good. What I did on the air was something of value. Today I get the chance to do something important. Working with some fabulous adults and teens I help to create the chance for young people to grow in their faith. To provide them with tools to help them find their way on their own life and faith journeys. A journey that can lead them to fully becoming the person God created them to be.

I believe this is where God wants me to be. I’m not sure I know why. I’m not sure that I have all the tools I need. I’m not sure I’m smart enough or spiritual enough or whatever enough. But I am sure this is where I’m supposed to be right now, struggling, failing, succeeding and struggling some more. An explanation was never promised, just an opportunity.

I do this because of the joy that comes with the sorrow, the questions that come with the answers, reward that comes with the work. I do this because I can do no other.

Peace

Through Jesus' Eyes

I watch people.
I don’t know if you’d consider that a bad habit or not. It’s not a matter of peeping through windows. I’m not trying to catch them at anything.

Hmmmm.

About half way through that last sentence I thought, “No I’m trying to catch them at EVERYTHING!” I wonder what I meant by that?

It began years ago. My first love and my first training are as an actor. I love performing, especially in front of a live audience. Words have always fascinated me, spoken words and written words (hence this blog). They have textures and temperatures. Some words are written but are meant to be spoken. For years Shakespeare baffled me. It wasn’t the sheer tonnage of words, although the style of his time was not to be sparing. They swirled and swooped and were beautiful simply in themselves but what the hell did they all MEAN? What was the story that they told? Once I saw the plays performed so much became clearer to me. I wanted to be up THERE, I wanted to give those words form and bring their stories to life.

As a student I was taught that all an actor requires is a passion and a plank. Something you cared deeply about and a place to tell your story. Diving deeper into my studies I found that so much more was needed to create “real” living characters on the stage. I could not walk with the bounce and energetic stride of a young adult for a character of middle age. The moment I took that step I plunged a knife into the heart of the character. So I had to learn to move, to stand, to inhabit someone else’s life within my own body. And that’s when I began to watch people.

The next time you find yourself with some free time in a crowded space try this. Just sit and watch. See what their bodies tell you about their lives, their hopes, and their dreams. It’s in how they dress, and how it fits, and how they move within it. Watch how they stand and what their hands do. Don’t watch their faces too much. We lie with our faces. Only the best liars can make their bodies speak other than the truth.

So what does any of this have to do with faith? Because once you begin to watch you will begin to see the humanity that lives around you. The uncertainty, the joy, the doubt and the delight. I believe this brings you closer to how Jesus saw the world. It’s too easy to turn your eyes inward and not really see the world around you (count them. Count the people who walk by who look but do not see, who hear but do not listen). How often did Jesus look at someone and feel himself moved by what he saw? Why does it happen so rarely to most of us? Because we do not see. Our eyes look at things that crowd around us, interfere with our passage to our goals. When we watch we are forced to see the people-ness of the people around us.

Beware. What you will see can become a burden on your heart. Make sure you watch all the people. Take special time for children. They will be the first to notice the difference in your eyes. We have forgotten how to see like a child but they always will notice an adult who actually sees them. Immerse yourself in their joy. The world is a new place to them. Everything is exciting and interesting. Revel in their vision. It will refresh, awaken and energize you.

As people of faith we are called to serve our community. By watching our community we will better know these people. In better knowing them we can better serve them. In better serving them we can change the way they think and feel. At the end we change what is within and that will change what is without.

And we will see it.

Peace