Because Ignorance requires an answer

Following the devastation of Haiti this week two outspoken idiots aired their intellectual deficiencies for the world to see. Rush Limbaugh decided that political game playing was more important than human suffering and Pat Robertson decided to twist not only theology but history in order to make sure that he could assign blame for the suffering of the nation.

So let me make one thing perfectly clear to the world.

Rush Limbaugh does not speak for me as an American.

Pat Robertson does not speak for me as a Christian.

In fact I don't believe that either speaks for most Americans or Christians of any stripe, style or persuasion.

The Haitian ambassador to the United States offered a wonderful retort to Robertson's astounding nonsense (you'll have to endure Pat's twaddle to get there):

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

How dumb is this guy?

This is New York State Assemblyman David Gantt (D)who represents a district near Rochester. Among his responsibilities is being chair of the Assembly Committee on Transportation. And that's what brings him to our attention.

There is currently a piece of legislation in Albany that would make texting while driving illegal. The goal of the bill is to save the lives of teens, who are the most likely age group to try this very stupid activity. That bill is stuck in process and hasn't been considered by the Assembly yet. While Assemblyman Gantt insists that he is NOT blocking consideration of the bill pretty much everyone else in Albany says he is. It has already passed the Senate and has enormous support in the Assembly. If you follow big time politics you know that committee chairs can play games if they so choose. There is every indication that Mr. Gantt is doing just that.

Now I'm not questioning his smarts because he chooses to block the bill. He has that right. Blocking it against the overwhelming support of your own party? That's dumb. Refusing to meet with the mom of a teen who died in accident caused by his texting who is advocating for the bill? Really dumb.

But that's not what put me over the edge about the Assemblyman. You see he has a pet piece of legislation of his own that he'd like to see passed. One that is much more sweeping than this bill. It's a "distractions while driving" bill that would do things like make it illegal to eat while driving. Yeah, I know it's not a great practice but I do it sometimes. It wouldn't be the end of the world if I stopped and was a little safer on the road. Then I kept reading. It would make changing channels on the radio illegal.

Let me say that again.

It would make changing the station on your car radio while you're motoring down the highway against the law.

Seriously?

Seriously.

And instead of passing this simple piece of legislation that might just get some folks attention and save lives he's holding onto a bill that is just idiotic in scope. It's been floating around Albany for awhile apparently and no one wants any part of it.

Gee I wonder why?

But I guess the Assemblyman is right and all the rest of us are wrong.

Nope, I don't think so. There's only one person in this equation that dumb. Hey, 133rd Assembly District! You need to have a talk with your Assemblyman.

Check out Donn Esmonde's column in today's Buffalo News for more.

Thinking about kids

Big surprise right?

Two news stories just jumped out at me this week. First is the story of the mom who dropped her two battling daughters off at the side of the road and drove away. The details are the daughters are 10 and 12, mom is 45 and a partner in a NYC law firm. The girls were in the back of the vehicle fighting like siblings do. My bet is that there was a fair amount of screaming going on. So mom pulls over tells them to get out in the business district of White Plains and drives away. Some of the details remain unclear. It appears that the older child did "catch up" with the mom but the younger child didn't and had to be rescued by a good Samaritan. To me that says that Mom went out of sight. Now I have to admit to having done something similar. The kid could be quite a willful child (still can be) when she was little and would sometimes refuse to come when it was time to leave a store. After trying to get her to cooperate I would inform her that it was time to go and I was leaving. I'd then walk out of her sight BUT WHERE I COULD ALWAYS SEE HER. It usually only took a few seconds before she'd be "ready to go". I'd never leave her to stew or anything like that. I'm astounded to see that mom apparently didn't go right back for the younger daughter or that the older daughter would leave her little sister.

To me this says the whole family has major issues that need some serious work.

The other story is currently being heard by the Supreme Court of the U.S. It involves a 13 year old honor student with no record of misbehavior who ends up getting strip searched (down to her bra and panties) when she is accused of carrying a prescription strength ibuprofen. She was also told to "shake out" her underwear in front of the school nurse and one other (female) staff person. No drugs were found. Family sued school and it has made its way up the judicial food chain.

My first thought was - I'd lose my job. In fact I was hard pressed to come up with a scenario where I'd even consider doing such a thing to a youth. Drugs? Nah. Weapons? Hmmmm, probably not. If I thought, really seriously thought, that a kid had a really serious weapon I'd call the cops if they wouldn't hand it over. But just a suspicion based on another kid saying it? No way. I can not imagine how the school officials justified this idea to themselves. How do you convince yourself this is a good idea? Some of it no doubt grows out of the "zero tolerance" concept, which is one of the stupider ideas of the last 20 years. Zero Tolerance is zero intelligence, zero common sense and zero worthwhile.

Two stories. Both about not taking enough care of our kids. One by doing too little, the other by doing too much.

Sad.

Peace

I am an idiot

Well I am.
Helping the kid plan a post semester trip to visit some of the relatives.
Had it all planned.
Bought the tickets.
First leg is Buffalo to New Orleans, then New Orleans to Burbank and Burbank to Pittsburgh. Very neat and amazingly affordable.

Completely overlooking the fact that one set of relatives no longer live in New Orleans but in Shreveport.

WHICH IS FIVE HOURS AWAY, ONE WAY.

Needless to say we have a small problem.
Which I will figure out.
Right after I stop pounding my head into the floor.

And some of you people leave your children in my care.

Yeesh.

Peace

(Cartoon courtesy of ASBO Jesus)

Thoughts on 100-0

(I've edited the original post, correcting the number of students at the school and adding a comment from the Dallas Academy coach at the end. He sounds like exactly the kind of coach I want working with my kids)

First things first. I'm well aware that I'm likely to get some grief in some circles for this post. It will be seen as "criticizing fellow Christians" which for some folks is an absolute taboo. I've never understood that since there's Biblical foundation for correcting one another. It seems to me that proponents of this "don't criticize" idea fear that it will make the church universal look weak. In fact fair and open correction of one another makes us strong.

Given my love of sports and young people this story just leapt out at me. You may have heard about the girls high school basketball game between Dallas Academy and The Covenant School (also from Dallas). Covenant School is a Christian academy that has built up its basketball program over the last four years to be an area powerhouse. Dallas Academy is a school that works with youth with learning disabilities and hasn't won a game in four years. It was a mismatch from the start and both sides surely knew who was going to win AND that the score would be lopsided. Why would Dallas Academy schedule such a team? I can only guess but I assume that Dallas Academy (which is small, about 140 students, only 20 of them girls and 8 of them on the basketball team) has limited options and plays teams in the vicinity. Plus you can learn by playing more skilled teams.

My problem is with the conduct of the other (Christian) team. According to some reports they maintained a press defense (if you're not into basketball that's an aggressive defense designed to cause mistakes and turnovers. It can be very effective against a good team. It is devastating against a bad one)until they had scored 100 points. The Covenant coach maintains that they dropped the full court press for a simpler defense once the score reached 29-0. Other reports claim that Covenant continued shooting 3 point shots well into the fourth quarter as well. Dallas Academy estimates they took a grand total of seven shots total in the entire game. The Covenant coach (now ex-coach. He was fired after publicly disagreeing with the school board on the game)says his team scoring by quarter was 35, 29, 24, 12. This would seem to support the idea that his team didn't back off till they hit the magic number.

Let's be fair. Games like these are excruciating for everyone involved. The winning team hates them, the losing team hates, all true fans of the sport hate them. There are ways to gracefully play the game without dishonoring the game or your opponent. 5 touch rules - no one on the better team can take a shot till everyone on the team has been passed the ball. This gives the other team more chances to steal the ball and get in play. Defense begins at mid court. Let the other team get that far before you defend. These are rules to be used only in the most extreme cases but they at least offer the other team a chance to play the game and learn.

Our faith should never take the back seat to winning. The Covenant Academy knew they could win this game at any point. They had the chance to reach out to the other team and offer themselves up as a learning moment. But it turns out the game was more important. And that's sad.

Kudos to The Covenant Academy for recognizing this and apologizing. They've also offered to forfeit that game in the standings. The school has shown itself to be a class act. The coach who defended the score has been fired. Between his coaching behavior and ill advised public disagreement with his bosses he brought that on himself.

Kudos as well to Dallas Academy Athletic Director Jeremy Civello:

"Civello told his girls the life lesson they could take from their loss: "I told them someday they will be on top in a similar situation and they should remember how they felt when some people were cheering for a team to score a hundred points and shut us out. Hopefully, my girls all learned a lesson in sportsmanship that will last them a lifetime." Dallas Morning News, 1/23/09

Stupidest man in America?

On another note is this the stupidest man in America?

From the Associated Press:

CHICAGO – Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich was arrested on Tuesday on charges that he brazenly conspired to sell or trade the U.S. Senate seat left vacant by President-elect Barack Obama to the highest bidder.

Seriously?

Seriously!??!?!?!?!

What you figured no one would notice?

Toward salvaging Confirmation

Confirmation in the Episcopal church has been suffering for a while. It would appear that we're not alone as Bishop Gerard Holohan of the Diocese of Bunbury in England says that confirmation "...has practically become a Sacrament of Farewell". Clearly the same has been happening in our church here in the States. Confirmation is "graduation from Sunday School" for too many families.

None of this is news to anyone paying much attention to the faith lives of our young people. What perplexes me is how little we really want to talk about the causes and possible solutions. There's plenty of talk on the subject but most of it is hand wringing over it all under pinned by a feeling that it's really all beyond out control.

And I think that's a load.

So let me take a shot at the subject - causes and possible solutions.

So why do we have this problem with Confirmation as the "Get Out of Church Free" card? I see several concepts at the root of this:

De-linking Confirmation and First Communion - Once upon a time Confirmation was the gateway to Communion. Since we have (very properly I believe) recognized that baptized children can be ready to receive at a much earlier age Confirmation has been left without a commonly understood function. We don't know what it's all about, it's just a church milestone to be gotten behind us as quickly as possible.

The Adults Have Allowed It to Happen Parents have raised their kids to believe it. Young people pay a lot more attention to how we act than what we say. Too often parent's actions say that faith/religion/church is an option, isn't really as important as skiing or soccer or work or whatever. The lay and ordained leadership of the church haven't done enough to show what Confirmation means. We haven't worked hard enough to make the faith that we supposedly hold so dear a living, vital thing for our younger brothers and sisters. I say supposedly because if it really was important, if it really was a precious part of our lives surely we would have desired to pass it on. Instead I see a satisfaction with simply teaching a few concepts and praying that they'll "get it eventually". It's a lack of faith in faith.

So what do I think we need to do to salvage Confirmation?

Make it the threshold event to adult membership - To do this I believe we need to change several things.

First make the age of confirmation 16. That's the canonical age of adulthood in TEC. So at that age when we call them adults Confirmation becomes the time when we ask them to confirm those promises made for them as children. The logic of asking for such a confirmation while they're still children has always puzzled me. I positively don't give a rat's butt about what it's always been. Confirmation at 12 or 13 or 14 is simply idiotic. It lacks a logic other than the Sacrament of Farewell. Anyone who argues for this based on "tradition" shows precious little concern for either the faith of our children or the life of the church.

Second - we need to stop screwing around and actually live out the canons. If they're adults then let them be adults. We live as hypocrites otherwise and they sense the hypocrisy. This means bringing them into places of responsibility, it means listening to them, and learning from them. It's astounding to watch what they can achieve when we allow them to take their place at our side or sometimes in the lead.

Third - we need to stop living a life in faith that is socially acceptable, careful, and secondary to our "real" lives. This isn't about making a great show of our faith. Scripture warns against that and it's just another form of fake faith. What you believe should color and influence everything in our lives from the moral decisions we make to how we drive, how we treat people on the street, to how we spend our money. Every choice we make reflects our true beliefs. That reflection either shows a person of faith (flawed and struggling certainly) or a hypocrite. Part of that is showing that being flawed and struggling is not a failure of faith but part of the life in faith. Our young people will see themselves in that faith struggle. They want no part (quite rightly) with people who mouth the words and live a lie.

I look at these ideas and think it seems so simple. As with so many things in this life of faith it may be simple but it's certainly not easy. It means changing how we live, it means putting in the work to create an environment of transformation for our children as they grow. It means releasing control and power. It means not just hearing but listening. It means accepting change.

And it means more of us have to be willing to stand up and call for that change. We must accept our call to ask questions, persist after answers, challenge power. It is a call without an terminal date. It is daunting. Intimidating. Exhausting merely to contemplate.

It is a call of the Spirit. How will you answer it?

Peace

At least they're consistent

Earlier this summer I noted my discontent with "The Living Church" (I'm So Angry I Could Spit). I wrote them a letter. In the earlier post I said I'd publish it here if I didn't hear back.

Well, they haven't published it and I've not heard back from them. Plus on the latest cover they've done it again. The cover shows young people taking Communion with a headline "Camp at Kanuga". Inside? Nothing. The cover is a tease, a heart warming "Gee isn't that nice" moment. Once you open the cover it's back to the "important" business of the church. The Living Church holds itself up as a news magazine but uses its cover for apparently non-news items. I find the practice astonishing.

So here's what I sent earlier in the year:

Your cover of the July 27, 2008 issue is the perfect image of what is wrong with (how we treat youth) in the Episcopal church.  A cover photo with a nice headline.  I was filled with anticipation of a substantial article about the Episcopal Youth Event (EYE) and/or the state of youth/youth ministry in our church.  Instead I got one additional picture and a very brief editorial.  The editorial amounted to "Gee, youth ministry is a nice thing and we're glad someone (else) is doing it".
 
Once again our youth are window dressing.  Once again they are used by church institutions for a bit of "feel good".  Once again no substantial support is placed behind the window dressing.  It is a metaphorical pat on the head before returning to the "important" business of our faith community.  In my diocese we refer to this as "potted plant syndrome".  Potted plants are there to look nice.  In reality they are given the minimum amount of attention required and are kept around only so long as they don't get in the way.
 
Additionally let me challenge you on journalistic grounds.  A subscriber picks up the issue, sees the photo and asks "Gee, what's EYE?".  They will not find the answer inside.   Again, the cover photo is simply window dressing.

Let me note quickly that there are dioceses and parishes out there that do a better job than that.  But the number, being well less than 100%, is too low.  Still too often our view of young people in church is that we've created programs for them "over there", away from "real church", "adult church", "big church".  Monies for youth ministry is too often cut early in the budget process when times get tight.  Some one once offered this test - compare your youth budget to the budget for garbage removal, the salary for your youth minister to your sexton (sextons are chosen because they are among the lowest paid staff).  In fact take a look at the percentage of your time, talent and treasure that are directed toward youth ministry.  Then decide if you can look your young people in the eye and tell them that there is an "emphasis on youth ministry". 
 
In the case of The Living Church I'm afraid you'd fail that test.

The words in parentheses in the first sentence were substituted for "youth ministry". It's not my intent to challenge the youth ministers but the rest of the church, most especially the power structure.

My respect for and interest in TLC has declined markedly.

Peace

I'm so angry I could spit

Much to the surprise of many folks who know me I am a regular reader of "The Living Church". I don't always agree with their editorial point of view but on the whole they are a reasonable voice of a more conservative view point than my own. My thoughts are often stimulated by what I read there.

Well we blew by "stimulated" with this morning's mail. As if often the case we received two copies over the weekend the July 27 and August 10 issues (the August 3 issue arrived last week - go figure). It was the July version that caught my eye. I've reproduced the cover here so you can judge for yourself.

The full cover is of young people attending EYE. The headline is EYE. I anticipated a nice article on this big event. I would think this is what any reasonable person would expect from a news magazine. Inside there was one additional photograph and a very short editorial. The editorial amounted to "We have young people in the church. They do cool stuff. We should keep doing that". The editorial was about three column inches long, the majority being a list of things that young people are doing in some parts of the church.

I was flabbergasted. I was dumbfounded. I was, well I don't use that kind of language on this blog. But I'll bet you can guess.

There was nothing about EYE, a gathering of over a thousand young people. An event where the Presiding Bishop appeared, hung out, worshiped with us before she left for Lambeth. If you don't know what EYE is you certainly won't find out by reading the TLC issue. There isn't any information there.

Once again young people are used as window dressing. It's gee, isn't that swell but let's not waste any of our resources on them. There's too many more important things going in the church.

And we wonder why the Sunday attendance is so old?

I'm so mad I want to swear. To throw things. To pound on something. When in the name of all that is Holy are we going to learn? I'm at a loss for words.

I'm sure the editors at TLC probably wish that were true. I just sent them a blistering letter (all very Anglican polite but seriously angry). We'll see if it shows up any time soon. If not I'll share it here at a later date.

What a rotten way to start a Monday.

Peace

And now for equal time...

A few days ago I wrote about a kind of mid-life crisis I've been having. Questioning what I've done with my life so far and the value of what I've accomplished.

In the days since I've been confronted again and again with little reminders about the other side of that coin. The comment posted on the first post, an e-mail, a message in the parish newsletter and last but certainly not least my rector's sermon today! With the exception of the comment none of them were direct responses to the post.

Coincidence? Or is someone up there trying to tell me something? Hmmmmmmmm.

So just to make sure that you don't think that I believe my life to be an utter waste and desolation let me talk about the positives in my life:

My wife. My friend, wife, partner, soul mate and advisor for over 30 years. We've gone through diagnoses of 3 chronic illnesses, one chronic condition, viral meningitis, several massive infections, two hip replacements, two periods of unemployment, a child born 2.5 months premature followed by 20 years of parenthood. We've lived in three different areas but have moved 8 times in 26 years. At the end of it we're still madly (my daughter would say nauseatingly) in love with each other.
I count that as a success(especially given my generations overall track record. In which case it's a world class success)

My daughter. Let's see. She's smarter than I am, more talented than I am, she's funny and articulate and brave. She's travelled more widely than I did at that age (or any age until very recently). The kid has been a wonderful child and is turning into a great adult who I hope will be my friend. Apparently my parenting skills are not so wretched that I screwed her up. Count that as a success.

Career - I've been blessed that with two careers at which I've had success. It's been my honor to work at things I care passionately about. For over 19 years I was a radio personality. Most of that time I was the morning man (at two different stations). I also wrote copy and did the news, recorded spots, chose music, did sports play by play and color, had my own talk show for a year, was the afternoon drive show three times and finished up in management. I worked hard, tried to be fair and gave my best every day. After that career ended I went to work as a youth minister. While I haven't succeeded at everything I've wanted to I'm not ashamed of what we've done. I've seen God move in the lives of my young people and I've had some small part in that process. I was able (with the help of some other gifted youth ministers) to re-start the youth ministry network in my province. I've worked at the local, diocesan, provincial and national level of my church and been respected at each one. Most of the people I've worked with have been sorry to see me leave.

I'm a pretty good photographer, a fair writer, not a bad singer. I'm learning to play guitar (oh so slowly!). I've biked up to 50 miles in a day after I was 40 years old (I'll do 42 more a week from today). I can fix things around the house that don't need to be re-fixed. I've designed theater scenery and built it. I've been the lead in a variety of stage plays over the years and done supporting roles too. They cheered at the end each time. I've learned something new every year of my life and there's no plan to stop that.

As my commenter(who I'm pretty sure is my brother) said I've had some adventures, things I'd never willingly give up. Not for just about anything. And I'm not dead yet.

I'm hard on myself. Always have been. At my last job review a couple years back I was marked down in only one area "Sets goals too high". My motto has always been "Good Enough, Isn't". I doubt that's going to change. God has given me gifts. I don't want to be the guy who buries his treasure to keep it safe only to have God say "But you were supposed to make it grow, stupid".

My parents always told me they were proud of me. That was important. I never wanted to let them down. I still don't. I don't want to let my brothers and the rest of my family down, I don't want to let my wife and daughter down. I don't want to let my friends down. I want them all to be proud to know me.

And yes I don't want to let God down. I want him to be proud of me too.

I'm afraid I'm stuck with my own high expectations. But it's good to remember that this has been a good life. That I've done things I can be proud of. That other people think well of me.

And that'll do.

For the moment. LOL!

Peace

A Horrible day so far...

Came in to the office this morning, fired up the computer and Firefox my trusty web browser won't work.

Actually it's spent the morning claiming it WAS working but that I just couldn't see it.

I've spent most of the morning at as many of the Mozilla help sites as I could find. None of them seemed to solve the problem. I've done everything I can think of doing, re-booting, going to a restore point (everything worked fine on Tuesday), deleted the profiles.ini file, finally broke down and deleted the program. Re-installed the program. Did several steps over again. Nothing.

(Thank God I had Opera as a back up.)

Finally got access to the Profile manager which let me get in under a default profile. Sadly it appears that several years worth of bookmarks are in the wind.

I can't imagine what happened yesterday that would cause this. The laptop went home with me to do some work, I couldn't connect to my home wireless network (still can't although my daughter can on her Apple laptop)and fiddled with some of those settings but using Restore should wipe those out.

I'm really angry about losing all those bookmarks. I'm hoping that since profile manager seems to believe my old profile is still here I might be able to snag them. Otherwise...

I'm going to be grumpy for the rest of the day.

Very, very grumpy.

My latest dilemma

I was just trying to check out.
But suddenly a moral/ethical dilemma reared its head and I was stuck.

On the card reader at the check out was the question that had pulled me up short. I just wanted to swipe my card, buy the drain cleaner and oranges and get one with my life.

But it demanded:

"Was your cashier friendly today? Yes. No."


Ummm, well, neither actually. It's not a binary system. She wasn't rude. She didn't ignore me. At the same time she wasn't pleasant. It was very basic, very business-like. A few quick words to get the process through to it's mercantile completion all wrapped around the business of chewing her gum. Even that wasn't obnoxious. It was just there like a third player in this little drama.

You see the dilemma arises because I'm sure that the computer system will note the time, the station, the date. Will my answer affect her next job review? What if she's right on the edge and one more down mark will push her out the door? Do I want that on my conscience?

In the end I chose the coward's way out. If I just swipe my card I can avoid the responsibility of grading this woman's job performance. I can exchange our few words, grab my oranges and Drano and escape.

Maybe I should have taken a different tack on the decision. She wasn't UN-friendly. I could have just accepted anything short of overt hostility as meeting the minimum requirement for making the "friendly" grade. But that seems cheap to me. A quick look at an online dictionary tells me that friendly means:

"...favorably disposed, not antagonistic...warm, comforting..."

Well she made the grade on one of four concepts (I skipped over the part having to do with friends. We're certainly not friends so that doesn't have any connection with the situation. What if we were friends? Would I have given her the thumbs up no matter how she reacted? But that assumes she would reacted the same way to me even if we were friends. "STOP", I shout to myself. That way lies madness.) She only made a one in four, 25%, a failing grade no matter how much you tweak the bell curve.

Now I have no choice I must pursue this moral/ethical hare to it's burrow. What about "unfriendly"?

"...not disposed to friendship..." (No, we've ruled that concept out of bounds so we'll pass) "...indicating a bad prospect, unfavorable..."

Well. Now what?

I'm starting to like that "unfavorable". All it would have take was a smile, you know! How much would that have cost, huh? Just a smile and I'm free from all of this! Some people, you know?

"...indicating a bad prospect...", well no, not really. She did her job efficiently. I was on my way with my stuff in short order.

No, I made the right decision. In the end this wasn't my fault or hers.

It's the store's fault. With its binary, black and white view of the world. Here's a perfectly efficient employee who does her job quickly and without error. Sure she's not the most personable person this green planet Earth. But really, what would you rather have - some chatty cheerful type who messes up the job, or a sober serious worker who gets it right the first time.

I can feel my disdain for the store on the rise. Feelings of fraternity and solidarity for my oppressed sister rising in my breast.

Stupid store!

Next time I'm there I'm going to look for her and go through her checkout.

And choose "YES".

Just to screw with the man.


Peace

The Hannah Montana "thing"

SIGH.

Ok, the latest celebrity girl moment that America is losing its collective marbles over are the photos of Miley Cyrus for Vanity Fair. As my daughter is a little older I didn't have to survive the whole Hannah Montana thing. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Pokemon were more than enough, thank you.

So how then, as the father of a daughter and a youth minister, do I feel about this whole flapdoodle? Let's do it point by point:

1: Are these photos terrible/horrible/obscene - In a word, NO. They were taken by one of the finest photographers of our time Annie Leibovitz. As always they are beautifully crafted and tasteful.

2: Was the one photo a good idea? Again, and in my opinion, NO. I'm talking about the one of her wrapped apparently only in a sheet. Word comes now that she was not in fact nude or in bed. But clearly the intent is to give that impression. It's a classic (almost cliche) sexy pose that's been done by a couple thousand models over the last 50 years and more. The problem I have is that Miley Cyrus is 15. And my question is - do we need to continue the trend of increasing sexualization of under age young women? The great thing about Miley was that she was cute and fun and cool without being overtly sexy. She has been about being a young woman, not a sex object. And that was really cool in an age when every other female teen star seems to feel the need to be stupid. So it's unfortunate.

3. Is it time to beat on Miley then? For the third time - NO. If I'm disturbed by anyone it's all the ADULTS who had to give the nod to this shot, starting with her father. Just really stupid and short sighted by them. Miley was working with this incredible photographer who was going to make her look fabulous, guaranteed. Annie Leibovitz could make ME look fabulous just imagine what she can do with someone really attractive!

4:What about the OTHER photos? I'm only referring to the ones taken of her with her then boyfriend not the multitudinous number of fake photos and videos. Seen them. And I've seen ones just like them done by hundreds of girls that age. Are they silly and embarrassing when you realize the whole world is looking at them? Yep, as she's acknowledged (and so do most of the other girls with these kinds of photos). She's being a silly, flirty teenaged girl who is exploring her sexuality and physicality. Not the smartest way to do it but a long way from the end of the world. She'll learn. We all do.

5: So what about the FUROR? Sigh. Let's see I've seen people say "It's no big deal, why not leave her alone?". Because it contributes to an environment that's detrimental our our girls. She could have helped and instead she hurt. Beyond that the rest of the comments I've seen have been idiotic and not worth repeating here. Once again American media and the nation conspire to create a tempest in a teapot over nothing. At best(worst?) this deserves an "I'm disappointed in Miley Cyrus and her advisors. I hope she does better in the future". Other than that it's a shrug and yet another chance to discuss body image and how we treat each other as humans rather than sex objects with our kids.

To everyone out there who is running around like their hair is on fire over this I ask these simple questions:

Are you stupid? Don't you have more important things to worry about?

Peace

For the Record

Because it comes up so much this time of year:

I do not like basketball.
I do not watch basketball.
There are only a few things about which I care less in American culture than who is in, out, on the bubble or is going to win the NCAA basketball championship.

March Madness is something I simply endure.
Tight lipped.

Go on, get it out of your systems and come back when you're rational again.

I hate this time of year.

On being passionate

For any of you who found the title titillating I'm afraid you're in for a disappointment. I'm talking about being passionate about faith and ministry.

My last post was a rant about folks who, if I'm being honest, I thought gored my ox. As it turned out it was mostly mis-communication with one of them(but not the other). A wise lady friend and former youth minister sent me a long but profound note about youth ministry. It got me thinking.

And here's what I thought:

I've known for years that I'm really only interested in things that I can dive fully into. That's when I'm fully engaged and I tend to throw myself into it. I was that way for a long time in my previous career in radio. It's how I am about youth ministry. One of my catch phrases is "Good enough isn't good enough". I have a perfectionist streak in me. When things aren't perfect I tend to get down about it. I could have done more, I could have done it better.

You can not imagine how many times my lady wife has watched me beat myself up this way. It's what I do.

But it's also what makes me good at what I do. I can get fully engaged because I BELIEVE in what I'm doing. And it bugs the heck out of me when I see people who aren't willing to go that far. I used to drive people crazy in my last career because I'd say "I only expect you to work as hard as I do. I accept that you may be better at some things than I am and that I'm better at somethings than you are. Final results are whatever they turn out to be. But I expect you to work as hard as I do. And I work very hard".

I expect that when a diocese or congregation tells me that youth ministry is important that they are going to WORK HARD at it. Too often youth programs are just that, programs designed to keep the kids busy and out of the adults hair. It's about the lecture hall vision of teaching and the "We have relationship with our youth for two hours every Sunday". It's "Oh that Bob and Mary's daughter" instead of learning the kid's name.

I have a confession (you're going to think I'm nuts). I hate what I'm about to do. It feels like cheating, like I can't do my own thinking and writing. It feels like I'm slacking.

I told you, I'm nuts. But it's how I feel.

I'm going to quote somebody else (see, see!!!! Nuts!). Martin Saunders is the Editor of Youthwork Magazine and Chair of Youthwork the Partnership, a huge youth ministry movement in the UK. I saw this interview at a great website run by the amazing Len Evans (Youth Ministry Interviews) and it just spoke to me. Len asked him "How would you like to see youth ministry change":

"I’d like to see every member of our churches start to take responsibility for young people – starting with the ‘adult’ leaders. The biggest problem for youth workers here is that many churches employ them to ‘take care of the problem’ of young people, instead of trying to understand and engage with them at every level. Unless young people get integrated into the hearts of our churches, then our churches are not long for this world. And of course, it’s the adult church leaders who hold the keys. So I’d love to see us move towards a model where the whole church takes some responsibility for young people – even if that just means praying for and mentoring them."

(Lazy. Slacker. You disgust me.)(I'm JOKING people!)

Martin got it exactly right. This is my hope for youth ministry as well. I don't care if we do great programs, or any program at all. I don't care if we do Youth Sundays or whatever.

We need to stop taking care of our youth and begin caring about our youth.

And now if you'll excuse me I have to get back to work.

Peace

Even better than I could say it

Here's what I would have said in my rant about Christmas rants. Only said better. (h/t to Grandmere Mimi (Wounded Bird: Letter From Jesus About Christmas) who pointed me towards Ann)

Letter from Jesus about Christmas (slightly edited for Episcopalians)

Dear Children,

It has come to my attention that many you are upset that folks are removing My name from the season. Maybe you've forgotten that I wasn't actually born during this time of the year -- it was some of your predecessors who decided to celebrate My birthday on what was actually the time of pagan festival. Of course, I do appreciate being remembered at any time.

How I personally feel about this celebration can probably be most easily understood by those of you who have been blessed with children of your own. I don't care what you call the day. If you want to celebrate My birth, here's how: GET ALONG WITH EACH AND LOVE ONE ANOTHER.

Now, having said that let Me go on... If it bothers you that the town where you live doesn't allow a scene depicting My birth, then get rid of a couple of Santas and snowmen in your own front yard and put out your own Nativity scene. If all of My followers did that, there wouldn't be any need for a display in the town square because there would already be so many all around your community.

Stop worrying about the fact that people are calling the tree a holiday tree, instead of a Christmas tree. It was I who made ALL trees. You can remember Me any time you see ANY tree. Decorate a grapevine if you wish: I actually spoke of that one in a teaching, explaining who I am in relation to you and what each of our tasks were. If you have forgotten what I said, look up John 15: 1- 8.

If you want to give Me a present in remembrance of My birth here is my wishlist.

1. Instead of writing protest letters objecting to the way My birthday is being celebrated, write letters of love and hope to soldiers away from home. They are terribly afraid and lonely this time of year. I know, they tell Me all the time.

2. Visit someone in a nursing home. You don't have to know them personally. They just need to know that someone cares about them.

3. Instead of writing the President to complain about the wording on the White House cards this year, why don't you write and tell him that you'll be praying for him and his family this year. Then do it! It will be nice hearing from you again.

4. Instead of giving your children a lot of gifts you can't afford and they don't need, spend time with them. Tell them the story of My birth, and why I came to live with you down here. Hold them in your arms and remind them that I love them.

5. Pick someone that has hurt you in the past and forgive him or her.

6. People in your town will attempt to take their own lives this season because they feel so alone and hopeless. Since you don't know who they are, give everyone you meet a warm smile -- it could make the difference.

7. Instead of nit-picking about what retailers call this holiday, be patient with the people who work for them. Give each a warm smile and a kind word. Even if they aren't allowed to wish you a "Merry Christmas" that doesn't keep you from wishing them one.

8. If you really want to make a difference, support organizations like Episcopal Relief and Development, who are working for better lives for refugees, prisoners, people suffering from diseases that are easily curable with a small amount of money, giving tools and resources so people can support their families.

9. There are individuals and families in your town who will not only have no "Christmas" tree, but also no presents to give or receive. If you don't know them, take some food and gifts to a charity who will make the delivery for you.

10. Finally, if you want to make a statement about your belief in and loyalty to Me, then behave like a Christian. Don't do or say things that you wouldn't do or say in My presence. Remember -- When you speak badly of my children, you are speaking badly of Me; when you treat each other badly, you do the same to Me. Let people know by your words and actions that you are one of Mine.

Don't get so worked up about what you think are slights about me that occur in the material world. I am God and I can take care of Myself. I am not diminished by those things.

Instead, simply love Me and do what I have asked you to do. I'll take care of all the rest. Check out the list above and get to work; time is short. I'll help you, but the ball is now in your court. And do have a most blessed Christmas with all those whom you love.

AMEN.

Rotten start to September.

Well September is off to a rip roaring start! Nothing but me being stupid and other bad news.

First me being an idiot. What you see on the right side here is the new logo for youth ministry in the diocese. It was designed by Bryan Sharry one of no less than TWO very talented design students from this diocese studying at the Pratt Institute in NYC. Pratt is one of, if not THE best design school in the country. So I was very happy when Bryan took the challenge on. I think the final product is great.
So much so that I wrote an article about the logo and Bryan and submitted it to the diocesan newspaper. When I opened the paper this morning I realized I had a problem.

I'd sent the wrong logo.

Bryan did several, I chose one, we tweaked it and voila. One of the old files was still lurking about (NOT ANYMORE!!!!!) and I sent it in.

I feel badly for Bryan, for the editor of our newspaper but mostly I feel like a complete and utter idiot. I did the article in the midst of camp, trying to get things out of the way.

Rule #1 - NEVER DO ANYTHING DURING CAMP SEASON!!! My brain is just too fried.

So I've sent the proper logo with appropriate grovelling to my friend, the wise and wonderful, forgiving person that she is, the editor in hopes that her opinion of me doesn't slide too far. (She once compared me to Moses. Silly woman. Of course it did take Moses 40 years to get to where he's going)

I'm very angry with me.

Next up is this headline from Yahoo news:

"Who" fans face two-year wait for new season (article)
It seems that David Tennant, the actor who plays the BBC's scifi icon "Dr. Who", has decided to take a little time off. Season four will air next spring but season five will have to wait till 2010!

Why, you ask?

SO HE CAN GO PLAY SHAKESPEARE AT THE ROYAL SHAKESPEARE COMPANY IN STRATFORD UPON AVON!!!! Including a long run as Hamlet.

I ask you, where are people's priorities these days?

Tennant has been wonderful as the Doctor, really revitalizing the franchise once again. I got sucked into the whole Who world with the fourth doctor Tom Baker, saw a few Jon Pertwee (#3) and some Peter Davidson (#5). Baker is still my favorite although Tennant(#10) and Christopher Eccleston (#9)are right up there.

But really. An actor turning his back on television to do the stage?

I love David Tennant!

Peace

God Blessed America

I have no idea what set me off. I've seen and heard the phrase probably a million times in my life. This time it was on a bumper sticker.

“God Bless America”.

Over the years I've been disturbed by the smugness that seems to underly the common use of that phrase. Too often it seems to mean “...but not you”. Or it is used as a triumphant punctuation at the end of a speech, one that says, “This is what God means/wants/ordains”. Worst yet is when it just a hollow political catch phrase meant to give the speaker the appropriately pious sound. I intensely dislike all of those usages.

This time was different. Suddenly a different phrase echoed in my mind. Not “God Bless America” but rather “God BLESSED America”. It suddenly struck me how much and in how many ways God has already blessed us. It borders on avarice to continually ask the Creator for more blessings. Then I began to consider some of those blessings.

We have been blessed with an area of land so filled with the riches of this world that we have created a standard of living beyond the dreams of most cultures before us. Even the poor in our country have comforts and wealth that the equivalent members of earlier societies could not even imagine. This blessing has allowed us to create almost limitless social wealth, and to produce food in quantities almost equally endlessly. Yet there are hungry not only in lands less blessed than ours, people in our own country are hungry. In a land of wealth beyond the dreams of Croesus we have not managed to provide basic health care for everyone. Families live in substandard housing. Basic education levels still fail to be reached. It's not that we can't do something about it. There is no doubt that we have the material wealth to make a difference.

Speaking of the wonderful land area with which we have been blessed, how well are we taking care of this blessing? Our great inland seas, the Great Lakes, suffer from vast areas where life can not exist. A river not far from where I grew up once caught fire! (In fact this same river caught fire several times over the span of some 30 years). The air can get so bad in parts of our country that we advise people with certain illnesses to avoid going outside and breathing it. We dumped so much junk into the ground in some places that it wasn't safe to build homes (or much of anything else) there because of the toxins that worked their way back up out of the ground. Maybe the reason we drink so much bottled water is because in our hearts we know we can't trust the water flowing in our streams and rivers and lakes. We deforest the hills, then strip mine them. The hills we build are the ever growing mounds of garbage we create.

This blessing of place also resulted in the chance to create a novel form of government. Unlike many political movements in Europe we could experiment with very little danger of our neighbors invading to overturn it. In that moment of space and time we created a governmental form that can actually function “...of the people, by the people and for the people”. Instead more and more of us turn our back on this blessing. We choose to walk away from the political process. That allows the power hungry and the profit hungry to turn the blessings we have been granted into their own personal resource.

Choices have been made and continue to be made. In this land of milk and honey shall we choose to continue to grow ever more out of shape letting our life spans decrease now instead of increase? Shall we choose to waste food (in so many ways) in a world where people go hungry? Shall we choose to continue building our lives on consumerism, usually in pursuit of things that are little more than throw away toys? Shall we choose to continue to pump toxins and filth into the air, and land and water because we do not want to be bothered to make the changes that could begin the process of revitalizing our land? Will we continue to choose to turn our backs on our responsibilities as citizens of this wondrous republic and allow our governmental processes to become a simple marketplace where the deepest pockets win? Is right to be complicit in a society that demeans it's members at home and uses torture on those we declare our enemies abroad? Is this truly how we are to use the blessings that we have been given?

Most parents face those moments when a child keeps asking for something over and over again. Even when you give it to them they can come back and ask for more or another. Finally you reach the point where you say, “What did you do with all the others I gave you? No more, till you learn to appreciate what you have!” . As I looked at that bumper sticker it struck me that our constant prayer/request/demand for God's blessing is a lot like that child. In all the ways that God has blessed us how can we possibly muster the temerity to ask for more? Rather we should be thankful for what we have been given and ask that God help us to better use those blessings. I recall the Gospel of Luke (13:48) which reminds us, “...to whom much is given, of him much will be required...”. Given our blessings what shall be required of us? Can we say that we have loved God and our neighbors to the standard of our blessings? Will we be able to say that we have “...act(ed) justly, love(d) mercy and walk(ed) humbly...”?

God blessed America. Now what?

Well I'm back

And I'm feeling grumpy.

Running around between three camps and a major family visit all in the span of 14 days has taken their toll. I've come down with a summer cold, quite possibly the most depressing of all illnesses. Plus the weather has been cold and dreary the last couple days.

Grump, grump, grump.

But that's not all. We had three campers simply not show up at one camp. The new management team at our facility is holding us to the terms of the contract (the previous managers were more casual about that. Which may be why they're the "previous" managers) which says we have to give a final count two weeks in advance. Well the count we gave was 33 and the final count was 30. That's a nearly $900 unfunded expense staring at me. I'm not upset in anyway with the facility, they are perfectly in their rights and they are at least considering my request to adjust the count. That's EXTREMELY nice of them. And something they don't have to do.

No the people I'm ticked with are the folks who simply didn't show up. Two of the three are folks with whom I'm familiar, they have my number, my e-mail, my address. Never heard a word from them. And now my budget, tight at best, has a big ole hole in it. The bills will be paid, money can be juggled to cover. But it means that other programs will be even tighter for the rest of the year.

So next year we'll be more serious about deadlines, deposits will be non-refundable, and fees paid for campers who drop out less than two weeks prior to camp will be forfeit as well.

And people will scream bloody murder. Just lovely.

Other than that camp went really well. All our camps were successes on their own merits. The kids had a great time. The staffs were marvelous.

Just wish I could enjoy the moment.

Grump, grump, grump.

Peace

Thoughts about...A process?

My office has serious mood swings.

Not me mind you but the office itself.

I go from reasonably orderly to disaster then back again. (Of course it does all this without any input from me naturally!) There are two primary problems for me when things get a total disaster. First I find it very depressing to try and get any work done. Second I know that I can't find everything that I have. In fact I'll be lucky if I remember everything I have because I haven't seen it in so long!

All of this comes up this time because the office is a disaster and I'm looking at being moved to a different office. Which means I have to pack and move. And I don't want to have to pack and move things that as I unpack them I'll think "This is junk, why did I keep this?". So I've been trying to bring some order.

Along the way I came across a piece I wrote at a seminar of some kind in the last year or so. I remember vaguely being asked to describe the process of my work. As I re-read it I realize that I haven't made much in the way of changes from then. It still rings true to me. And perhaps to you as well. So I'm sharing it here:

What is the process? More importantly am I looking for THE process or A process? In my heart I believe that it is A process, specifically MY process. My mind keeps casting for a definitive process, the surefire, can't miss way that will allow me to produce from moment one. Of course the ongoing search allows me to delay the beginning of any project. The question arises that if I allow myself to delay past the point of no return (defined as the point when I am no longer capable of beginning) can I live with the "what-ifs"? It strikes me that I begin too many things without finishing them, fiddle with too many things without discovering if I could master them. My life is already dominated by too many projects that didn't so much end as they just stopped. Too many ideas never explored. Too many opportunities never pursued.

So I think the question answers itself. I must begin a process, some process, perhaps even ANY process. Beyond that I think I need to focus that process on projects that already exist. There the process can be fine tuned on ideas that already have some form. This can help me succeed, grow confident and prepare me for the totally new future projects. The siren's song calling me to newer, more alluring concepts must be resisted. It is one thing to take notes in preparation for the "next" but it cannot seduce my attention away from the "now"."

I have projects that I began six years ago that aren't finished yet. I have projects sitting on my desk that need to be done now that languished while I wrote this post. I have notes from meetings going back several years that have ideas I wanted to remember lying in a pile of torn pages.

The work day is almost over. I have two more days this week to be constructive.

What is my process?

The day after I wrote this I found myself spending a fair bit of time on "new projects". I pulled up short, went back to my to do list (which is part of my process) and worked on some things that had been sitting there for a while. Those meeting notes? Sorted sifted and consolidated into usable form! Three items completely finished on the list and two more with serious dents in them! Hallelujah! Whoops, it's lent I'm not supposed to say that, lol.

Peace